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General :
Now what?

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 rugirlie927 (original poster new member #37510) posted at 3:11 PM on Wednesday, June 12th, 2013

When a man cries, really cries....sobs...is he sorry? Truely sorry? He told me it was the first time in years...that he has finally "woken up." Now what?

Me: 27
WP: 31
Together 10 years
D-Day: 11/13/12

posts: 40   ·   registered: Nov. 15th, 2012
id 6371177
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Chefj9 ( member #38604) posted at 3:17 PM on Wednesday, June 12th, 2013

When a man cries, really cries....sobs...is he sorry? Truely sorry?

My WH has sobbed and cried in front of me about what he's done. But he was still doing it.... Since he has gotten serious about R and getting himself better, he has not really cried. At least not in front of me.

ME - BS 50, Him - WS 46 trying to "R"
4 DD's - blended 26,16, 15 and 13
Multi DDays the grand finale 5/13/2013
From here on out, I am only interested in what is real. Real people, real feelings, that's it, that's all I'm intere

posts: 476   ·   registered: Mar. 2nd, 2013   ·   location: Texas
id 6371189
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TattoodChinaDoll ( member #34602) posted at 3:18 PM on Wednesday, June 12th, 2013

I am not familiar with your story so I can only tell you from my experience. WH/STBX has sobbed like that....for himself. For his pain and frustration...because he was upset I wasn't feeding into his NPD and it wasn't all about him. Listen to your WH's words. Does it match his actions? Is he consistent?

Me: 35
WH: 37 TimeToManUp
Married: 14 years, together 19 years
3 daughters: 12, 8, 6, and 2 angel babies (2013 and 2014)

D-Day: 12/21/2011
Confronted him: 12/22/2011

This is the most difficult thing I've ever done.

posts: 1841   ·   registered: Jan. 20th, 2012   ·   location: New Jersey
id 6371192
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confused615 ( member #30826) posted at 3:20 PM on Wednesday, June 12th, 2013

No..tears don't always mean they're sorry for what they did. Sometimes those tears are for themselves..they're sorry they were caught..sorry they've had consequences...sorry they have to deal with a sad and angry BS.

Tears,IMO,mean very little. Actions...what are his actions showing you?

BS(me)44
FWH 48
4 kids
M: June 2001
D-Day: 8/10/10



..that feeling you get in your stomach, when you heart's broken. It's like all the butterflies just died.


posts: 15220   ·   registered: Jan. 15th, 2011
id 6371195
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 rugirlie927 (original poster new member #37510) posted at 3:40 PM on Wednesday, June 12th, 2013

I've seen no action yet, this is the first I have even seen of a true apology...or what seems like one anyway. I don't even know if I want him in my life anymore...I don't want to just be a fallback or someone that is rotated in.It sucks when you love someone but don't want to be naive.

Me: 27
WP: 31
Together 10 years
D-Day: 11/13/12

posts: 40   ·   registered: Nov. 15th, 2012
id 6371235
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