SurvivingInfidelity.com^®

So the big Disney vacay is coming up. Stripper-whore, baby, ex-shat, Teslet, an uncle and a couple of cousins.

Scheduled to get Teslet the 14th. I texted to confirm dates with him last week...he asked to pick Teslet up the evening of the 13th at 6. I had no problem with that.

I just get a text from this mother fucker that he is running late and will be by at 7.

Ummmm....ok...figured it wasn't meant for me because today is the fucking 12th. So I send back a text saying that...I left out 'fucking.' He texts back that they are leaving tomorrow morning and he needs to get Teselt tonight.

WHAT THE FUCK DUDE??? HOW STUPID ARE YOU????

I did not text that to him. I texted him this

What are the dates he will be gone? You confirmed the morning of the 14th originally and then asked to pick him up at 6 on the 13th.

And now I'm waiting for a response from the idiot. How does he not know shit? How did I end up with such a loser idiot?

I am beyond pissed off right now. I'm just barely holding it together so I don't go off on this stupid piece of shit. Do not jerk me around because you can't keep your shit straight, ex-shat. I was mentally prepared for tomorrow night...I am not ready for this to happen tonight.

If that fucking piece of shit texts me that it was supposed to be tonight and he gave me the wrong date, then I will tell him that I will expect to pick Teslet up 24 hours early from this little trip.

I have not received a return text yet in all the time it has taken me to type this out. Seriously about to go fucking insane on this guy.

Ok, deep calm cleansing breaths....do not lose it do not lose it do not lose it....

What an idiot!! Come on ... who gets vacation dates confused??? Hang in there tesla ... keeping telling yourself that mantra "do not lose it. do not lose it."

Nobody can be this stupid - surely he is goading you.

The sad clown has asked me to take the girls for a few extra dates at a time and he has cancelled only a week prior when I notice some other change he has made clashes with the dates he requested.

Oh yeah - I don't need to change those dates.

Deal with him as you would a very very dense colleague. Someone you have to tolerate but who is not a part of your real life.

((Tesla)) You do get him back a day early - yay!!

No, he's not goading me...he's seriously this fucking clueless. He has always been like this...which was why I was so fucking great for him because I could keep all the nitty-gritty straight and tell him when and where to fucking show up.

I will be ok. I will be ok. It's in Teslet's best interest. He's going to have a great time. I have a long list of to-do items that I've been saving for when he's gone...just get to start a day earlier than I thought.

I also told that fucker that the only reason this is ok is because we are home and didn't have plans. The next time that will not be the case. One fucking freebie. This idiot needs to learn to sort his shit.

(((Tesla)))

Let us know how it goes tesla.

I totally understand the being mentally prepared thing.

((((tesla)))) What a maroon.

He just picked teslet up. I hate this. They get to have a Disney vacation. Fuck his shock and awe parenting style.

Someone pass a bottle of 'whine' -- pity party for me tonight.

Tesla, I can tell you from experience with my kids, this Disney parenting shit will only work while your son is young. When he gets older he will see your XH for who he really is.

Heck my kids let him think they were buying the bullshit just so he would keep doing the fun stuff.

What will matter when your son gets older is who has been there for him, not who spent the most money or took him to fucking Disneyland.

What helped me when the kids were gone for a long time was staying busy. Do something for yourself during this time also.

(((HUGS))) to you, Tesla.

I get it hun. I really do.

My 5 year old has been sayin that she never gets daddy time because OWUmpteen is always around. It makes me sad and mad - one because she doesn't feel important and two because he is squandering precious time stolen from me - I could be savouring whilst making her feel as cherished as she is to me.

After all that has been robbed of me already this part stings the most.

Kids do enjoy 'stuff' but it is a poor substitute for being cherished.

((Tesla))

When we were separated, my kids asked H why he never would do the "fun" stuff when he lived with us. They had his number. He had been too wrapped up in himself to do family activities before he left. Visitation forced the issue.

They figured out that they could intentionally ask to go to the cool (expensive) places and his guilty ass would take them. Continuing those fun activities at least once a month was part of their conditions for his return home.

Don't worry. Teslet has a great mom. He'll figure out "Disney Dad" as he gets older.

((tesla)) Do something nice for yourself sweetie.

The others have it right when they say the Disney parent crap will only last while they are so young. They figure out how to play the game to get the goodies from Dad (and isn't that heart-breaking in itself), but the person they trust will be YOU.

I had no idea that it was National Douchebag Week! I guess that we didn't get the memo!

I'm sorry that Teslet left you early. I totally get it. I need the mental preparedness as well. If you hadn't just been here, I'd say come and visit! I also like to use the time the kids are away to get less pleasant tasks done. It's nice to have them out of the way so that I can truly relax when I'm spending time with my kiddos.

So, go attack some loathsome chore with all your might, and use your ex-shat's stupidity to give you that extra boost of adrenaline you need to get it done. What a stupid dope. He definitely needs to move to Bangladesh.

(((tesla)))

Thanks everyone. It's so hard watching Teslet get excited about this trip. I want him to be happy and have fun. I know he will.

This is going to be a long trip. Hopefully ex-shat will actually have to do some *gasp* parenting.

I have lots to do to keep me busy. Lots of good old physical work around the house and yard to keep me tired.

If only that idiot would wander into a jungle in Bangladesh and run into a fucking tiger. I should be so lucky. I doubt he's taken me off his life insurance policy, he's so fucking incompetent.

Gah, if in Bangladesh, my XH would like tangle with the tiger, save 27 lives and be on the front of CNN page over it. I swear to Gah, nothing EVER happens to him.

Hopefully Teslet has fun. Didn't mean to turn it to me.

I'm sorry, tesla. I hope you get lots done and time flies.

Big hugs,Tesla.

Get the crappy stuff out of the way. Enjoy a minute to yourself & before you know it, Testlet will be back.

From everything you've said about Teslet, I get this -

He'll be excited about Disneyland and will have fun.

He'll get excited if you plan a day of fun near home for the two of you, and will have fun.

So... plan something special for after he gets back. Not immediately - give him a week or so to get the trip out of his system.

But when he gets home, tell him you have X planned for the two of you in a week or two (a trip to the zoo, a hiking trip to look for bugs... whatever. Use your imagination).

He'll get geared up for it & be excited, you'll get the satisfaction of seeing him anticipating having fun with you, and you can be a "fun" parent too, while still being a responsible one.

And the one-on-one attention while doing something he likes will probably mean a whole lot more than being one of a big group at Disney.

About that life insurance policy............... I'm putting a clause in our d-papers that state that I will be #1 beneficiary, until my children are grown.

I'll bet you could get something like that stipulated too.