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anonymous823 (original poster member #39433) posted at 3:24 PM on Monday, June 17th, 2013
My IC and our couples therapist recommended "The Passionate Marriage" to us as a together read. I thought this might be helpful to share , just in case any of you were looking for books. I just started it today but so far it's been very helpful.
SilverRose13 ( member #33982) posted at 5:42 PM on Monday, June 17th, 2013
We have this book. I've read about 2/3 of it. It is ok, but a lot of it triggered the hell out of me and just generally pissed me off. But that could just be me. I think the book would work well for a lot of people, I'm just not one of them. Hope it helps you!
Together 25 years, Married 23
BS (me; 42)
fWS (wtsmm; 43) 2 1/2 yr LTA
2 children, 21 and 15
DD #1 9/27/2011 (EA/Sexting)
DD #2 10/3/2011 (Some PA)
DD #3 11/28/2011 (Full Disclosure*) nevermind, didn't even have half of it
LA44 ( member #38384) posted at 6:25 PM on Monday, June 17th, 2013
I have heard about this book too and will check it out.
Thanks a823!
Me: 44
He: 47 WH
Married: 15 years
D Day: December 2012
Affair: Fall 2009 - Dec. 2011
R is not linear
inconnu ( member #24518) posted at 6:41 PM on Monday, June 17th, 2013
I read this book, back when I thought I was in R (turned out to be false R). I thought it was a great book, but it did show me what was lacking in my marriage.
I think it also helped clarify, for me, what a great marriage/relationship is supposed to be like, and I've used what I learned from the book in my relationship with my SO. 
Just remember, both people need to be willing to work together to build a really good relationship. If you're both not on the same page, it doesn't matter what any book says.
There is no joy without gratitude. - Brené Brown
Rebreather ( member #30817) posted at 6:45 PM on Monday, June 17th, 2013
I think this book is very good and quite different than many others. We see a lot of unhealthy enmeshment on this board. But, I also think this is a book about marriage, and not about healing from infidelity, so it might be something for further down the road.
The best out-of-the-gate book is Not Just Friends.
Me BS
Him WH
2 ddays in '07
Rec'd.
"The cure for the pain, is the pain." -Rumi
anonymous823 (original poster member #39433) posted at 6:50 PM on Monday, June 17th, 2013
My IC recommended it because she felt it would encourage me to do work on myself and delve into my issues with intimacy. The married folks I know have said it's helped them individually and as mates though so I am reading it with my F as well.
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