SurvivingInfidelity.com^®

Sitting here in my living room, on my computer, drinking a ginger beer, and there is a wonderful sound coming from my garage. What can it be?

The sound of a shredder.

The sound of a shredder shredding pornographic stories.

Yes, THOSE pornographic stories. The ones that he said he valued more than me. What's more, all of the Playboys and other erotica are boxed up in our truck and tomorrow, he's heading off to the landfill to deposit them.

I think that I'm just going to sit here and enjoy the sound of the shredder.

less porn in the world, woot woot!

that is awesome.

and i feel like i want a ginger beer too!

What a wonderful sound!

That is awesome. I love posts like this

That is a really good thing.

Well, I might still have the nannycam in the garage making sure that it's not the latest USA Today making that sound..... but if you're optimistic I'm right there with you.

(((Skan)))

Great.

I can remember doing this when my first H had left and I found his stash in the loft, in the downstairs cupboard, in the wardrobe, behind the radiator etc, along with the hidden bottles of whisky. It will be he'll for you now, but one day in many years time, you might see the funny side of it when something crops Jo Ina really weird place.

I have followed you Skan and your wise words have given me such strength over the past few months. I wish you well with what you are handling now. It's really tough. It's so like my first husband, but things will get better as you regain control and you will end up happy. I did (with new husband with different issues). I would have managed so much better back then with H1 had I found SI then.

Ah, Skan, that is great news!! I'm so rooting for you guys...I'm glad you stood your ground. He totally loves you!! He's proving it by his actions. I can't even imagine the feelings you felt when you found all that stuff. But, now it will all be destroyed. Finally. Hope you woke up happy today. :)

Oh Jrazz, no nanny cam. But a before and after look. And a question that I just "HAD" to get answered while he was shredding. And there he stood, shredder on our freezer chest, porn in hand, recyclable container at his elbow, feeding them in, two sheets by two sheets. My momma didn't raise a complete fool. He even shredded his high school letters that had his "alter ego" name on them the one that he used on AFF and his other fuck sites to corrupt his brain.

And that's all nice and good. But the plain fact of the matter is that he lied to me, for over a year, that he had gotten rid of all of that stuff. He looked me in the face and lied to me. Knowing that it would throw me back into panic attacks, nightmares, paranoia, let alone the heartbreak, he lied to me, knowingly, willfully, and maliciously. And then he told me essentially that that stuff was more important to him then I was. He drove me out of the house to have PTSD breakdowns by my self, in a hotel room, surrounded by strangers. He ripped all of the healing tissue off of my scars and has caused a lot of healthy tissue to be destroyed. And he can't still tell me why he had to put me through this.

I have not forgotten that. I will never forget that. And if he doesn't get his shit together, I will pull the trigger. I am becoming a battle-scared person with a 1000 yard stare. Narrowly focused on his actions.

I would like to hear the sound of a phone being smashed to bits. All of my ws porn is stored in his phone

I would go to the landfill with him tomorrow, just incase he is just taking them to another location like a storage facility.

Why is he not also shredding the 'other erotica'? It would worry me that some of those people that work at the dump would take that stuff home with them. I would burn it all.

I'm not saying that the 'other erotica' your H has is anything even vaguely similar to this, but just a disgusting story to share:

Years ago, my brother and I were cleaning out a property we had bought for a rental. There were some boxes left, and what we found was horrifying. Something I would have never imagined could even exist.

We found children's coloring books depicting children performing oral sex on grown men and other sex acts involving children. I remember feeling such a vile revulsion I began shaking and crying. We burned everything immediately.

I will never forget that. The world is so fucking evil.

The willingness of that permanence is admirable.

Yeah. I came here tonight actually mainly looking for news of you. I am glad to hear this. These are positive steps. Stay strong. Actions actions actions.

PainPain, we would have had to rent an industrial sized shredder to shred 6 boxes of Playboys, etc. It would have taken days and I was not going to be here for days while he spent time in the garage with this crap. Instead, he took it to a recycler located in the dump. The recycler had him put the taped boxes into a extremely large metal bin with cardboard and other paper products which was going to a recycle facility to be dumped into a huge shredder and then pulped. I don't think that too much of that crap is going to get around.

As for the person who suggested burning it, we live in SoCA. In an extreme fire danger place. And I worked for a long time in fire/rescue of large animals in the backcountry. There is nothing that would have induced me to try to burn this large amount of material in this area. Too dangerous, although the mental image of dancing around the pyre, tossing Miss November into the flames makes me smile, and no in a good way!

All quiet today. We had Retrouvaille this morning and are taking a break from trying to rototill our front yard. Having some long, heartfelt talks along the way. Trying to see if there is anything to salvage. I am cautiously optimistic say a 4 on a scale of 1-10. But I still have his IC to see and he has a LOT of actions to take before we're even close to being "OK."

Been thinking of you, Skan. How are things going?