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Just Found Out :
so afraid of seeing them together

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 savvy (original poster member #39102) posted at 2:16 AM on Thursday, July 11th, 2013

I am filing for divorce, no question there. my problem is Ow lives with in a mile of both my house and business. if I have to see his car there it is going to kill me every time. I could avoid going that way I guess even though its the best route. but what if now that its out in the open they start going places together and I run into them. how do deal with this? I have told him to be respectful of my feelings on this if he is at all capable.

he said he would but he is a liar. don't know if I can do this!

me-BS (52).
2 children 24 and 23
Together 33 years divorced one year
Ow-(30)and she knew me knew he is married.
D-day 1 4/24/2013
D-day 2. 7/9/2013. Day after anniversary
D-day 3. 8/12/13.
Filing for divorce

posts: 135   ·   registered: Apr. 26th, 2013   ·   location: connecticut
id 6404070
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RidingHealingRd ( member #33867) posted at 2:26 AM on Thursday, July 11th, 2013

{{{savvy}}}

That's a tough one. No question, I would avoid going that way. Don't subject yourself to additional upset.

I'm sorry but I really don't have any advice. I moved 1600+ miles away to avoid any of that. I feel for you.

ME: 60 BS
HIM: 67 WH
Married: 35 years
D'Day: 10/29/10
in R 10 years and it's working but he is putting 200% into it (as he should) to make it right again.

The truth hurts, but I have never seen it cause the pain that lies do.

posts: 2519   ·   registered: Nov. 9th, 2011
id 6404081
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Duffy1958 ( member #39755) posted at 2:51 AM on Thursday, July 11th, 2013

You can do this. You are about to round a corner of regaining your life back. That's going to help. You are going to see them at one point, dear Savvy, but later, rather than sooner would be better so avoid the route in which you could see. Think Clara in Texas-the dentist who ran over her husband. You don't want to be tempted.

Hopefully the STBX will be decent about this one thing for a bit anyway. Just be careful. If they become revengeful, they will go for it. By that I mean, probably wise to not bring up again. Don't remind him it's a weak spot because they ARE liars, asshats etc.

Just determine they have been given too much space in your life as it is. They have a plague. Sick people. Avoid.

That sucks big time. I'm sorry Savvy.

If you see them together, RUN up to her, extend your hand & say as loud as possible "DARLING! I've

been LOOKING for you! I want to extend my hand to you. Help you up out of that gutter you fell in."

Hugs. Prayers for you too.

Me-SAHW soon 55
Him-asshat age 60
Married 3.5 years together 13.5
Step-children 8 altogether Grandchildren.
Cheaters are the same yesterday, today & forever. They may have different caveats but they lie the same & pull the same shit.

Where i

posts: 114   ·   registered: Jul. 5th, 2013   ·   location: California
id 6404102
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hailstormer ( member #35873) posted at 2:58 AM on Thursday, July 11th, 2013

I know exactly how you feel we were living just a couple miles apart and after being together for over 20 years I was petrified of even running into him or worse his hoe even at the grocery store.

I went to the next town over for everything was just a better thought could even go to dinner with friends or my kids and not constantly look around thinking I would see them together. Not sure I could control myself even in public.

Good Luck

me(BS)-55
him(WS)-53
together 21 years
1st D-Day 4-19-10
2nd D-Day 5-3-12
married 19 years
2 kids 13-twins
Unfortunately...divorcing

posts: 123   ·   registered: Jun. 18th, 2012   ·   location: Florida
id 6404109
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scrambled2 ( new member #38901) posted at 9:17 AM on Tuesday, July 16th, 2013

Hi I was so worried about this too. However over the past 7 mths I have gained so much strength (too be honest it's inside us we just forgot for awhile) Anyway, I saw her in H car - she saw me and ducked! Hmmn she was hiding from me. Guess what I did I stood and stared at her..she slowly lifted her head saw me still staring @ her & then drove off...yes peering over the dashboard. And then 1 week later I was driving home she was delivering newsletters saw me & tried to hide in the bushes. I think she was more afraid of me. So if you see her hold your head up high & realise that she will always be the POS under your shoes. They can never match us.

posts: 26   ·   registered: Apr. 5th, 2013
id 6409372
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