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musiclovingmom (original poster member #38207) posted at 4:48 AM on Saturday, July 20th, 2013
I've been struggling lately with feeling inadequate. Lots of comparing myself to the OW and using my words (and their words) to brow beat myself. This morning, blakesteele posted about allowing ourselves to change. I know I can, I have before. This 'me' is an old me. One that existed before my H and I were even together. Tonight, I attended a mother/daughter fashion show at my church, and was smacked with the inspiration I needed to get out of this spot. I don't think I can share it, because it is a Bible verse and I don't want to cross that 'no religion' line. But, where have you found inspiration when you were stuck in a downward spiral?
canteat ( member #39636) posted at 6:08 AM on Saturday, July 20th, 2013
I take inspiration wherever I can get it! I have gotten a lot of it here-from others sharing their stories. People have been through so much pain and are so strong that I can't help but be inspired.
And this might sound weird but I inspire myself. I am trying to do things to make ME the ME I want to be. Each time I do something for myself I get to put a little check in the "win" column and that inspires me to keep doing it!
Me: BW 42
Him: WH 47
Married 9 years-together 18
Dday: 6/17/2013 EA/PA(EA 1yr/PA 6mos-OW out of state)
status: Starting R 7/22/13
musiclovingmom (original poster member #38207) posted at 1:35 AM on Sunday, July 21st, 2013
And tonight, my mother. We were talking about something completely unrelated to the A's that has got me raging mad at a family friend. My always wise mother said these two things:
She can't go back and redo...only deal with this a day at a time. I am sure that if she knew then what she knows now she would do differently.
-and-
Just perspective, honey....looking forward instead of back.
If anyone had mentioned these to me 6 months ago, I probably would have ripped their head off. I think they are exactly what I needed to hear at this point. Last night about healing me, tonight about helping to heal our marriage. Hope this upswing lasts a bit.
ifinallyfoundme ( member #39523) posted at 1:45 AM on Sunday, July 21st, 2013
Can you PM me with the bible verse? I can use a little inspiration about now.
ifinallyfoundme ( member #39523) posted at 2:02 AM on Sunday, July 21st, 2013
I was feeling a little down as well. I feel as though I was being punished for my faith and trying to live a decent moral life. I can't get high or drunk with him and be true to myself but most importantly GOD. Todays "Daily Bread" really spoke to my heart.
I can't be-nor desire to be- the person he wants me to be.
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