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savvy (original poster member #39102) posted at 4:10 AM on Saturday, August 17th, 2013
After my Wh broke off affair and we started MC .... It only took him about 2 weeks to contact her again. I found out and now am filing for divorce. I am beyond hurt! I don't want to give up our 30 years together But what else can I do I can never trust him again! He still saying he's not ready to pull the plug on our marriage but doesn't know what he wants. Oh well too late I am pulling the plug. I am in so much pain I feel like I am going to jump out of my skin. Will I ever get over the fact that my husband/best friend of 30 years has done this to me and wants to be with this OW. All I want to do is lay in bed although not allowing myself to. Can't stop crying for more than an hour. Please tell me I will recover!
me-BS (52).
2 children 24 and 23
Together 33 years divorced one year
Ow-(30)and she knew me knew he is married.
D-day 1 4/24/2013
D-day 2. 7/9/2013. Day after anniversary
D-day 3. 8/12/13.
Filing for divorce
caregiver9000 ( member #28622) posted at 4:22 AM on Saturday, August 17th, 2013
(((hugs)))
tissue. Buy many boxes.
(((more hugs)))
You will survive this. It is totally acceptable to have a few days of feeling like you can't or don't want to crawl out of bed!!
It gets better. You will find things that empower you. Things you enjoy that you had stopped doing. New things you enjoy that you only now discover!
Time is a four letter word. But it so does the trick.
(((more hugs)))
Me: fortysomething, independent, happy,
XH "Stretch" (and Skew!) ;)
two kids, teens. Old enough I am truly NO CONTACT w/ NPD zebraduck
S 5/2010
D 12/2012
womaninflux ( member #39667) posted at 4:28 AM on Saturday, August 17th, 2013
I recently went through this...DD was mid March, finally admitted to an affair late march, AP said they should take a "break" (ya think???) continued contact with AP through April (just admitted to that), suspected that was happening and SAWH just admitted a few days ago that he finally broke it off first week of May (this happened early may and he admitted he lied about where he was that day but he covered it with another lie which I did not believe fully and he finally admitted truth - so similar to your situation).
I'm not giving up...I know it sounds odd but I am finally believing in him again. Coming clean is not easy for him. He's in therapy with a CSAT and in MC and on Prozac. This (and other admissions this week) were a big deal.
BS - mid-40's
SAWH - mid 40's
Kids - 2 elementary school aged
Getting tons of therapy and trying to "work it out"
BrighterFuture ( member #38914) posted at 4:56 AM on Saturday, August 17th, 2013
Since he has repeatedly broke NC, go ahead and file out of respect for yourself. If he truly values you he will do everything in his power to end it with the OW and fight to get you back at which point you can stop the divorce process. Be good to you because he's not.
Hugs and I'm sorry for your pain.
Me:30
Him:31
D-day:2/24/13 (I was 10 weeks pregnant at the time and DS was 15 months)
Status: Parted ways!
"If only I can fight just a little longer, I know it's gonna make me stronger" Jamie Grace-Holding on.
Skan ( member #35812) posted at 6:46 PM on Saturday, August 17th, 2013
I'm so sorry. (((hugs))) It's more than OK to decide that this is what you need to do. Be kind to yourself this weekend.
Imagine a ship trying to set sail while towing an anchor. Cutting free is not a gift to the anchor. You must release that burden, not because the anchor is worthy, but because the ship is.
D-Day, June 10, 2012
niaveone ( member #40317) posted at 10:48 PM on Saturday, August 17th, 2013
I'm so sorry for you. Be kind to yourself, don't expect to get ANYTHING done and just go somewhere to get out of Dodge for a couple days. You need fresh air, and a new perspective. And your WS needs to sweat.
Me: BS
Him: WS
Married: 24 years
2 children
2 DDays
Reconciling
HardenMyHeart ( member #15902) posted at 11:27 PM on Saturday, August 17th, 2013
Me: BH, Her: WW, Married 40 years, Reconciled
noprincess ( member #38660) posted at 3:16 AM on Sunday, August 18th, 2013
(((savvy))) I'm so sorry, hon. I'm right there with you. You will survive this, you will.
"Never, never, never give up." - Winston Churchill
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