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ccw82 (original poster member #40133) posted at 10:48 PM on Saturday, August 17th, 2013
I am looking for some fresh advice. I have been doing some soul searching, and have decided to try and really reconcile with WH. He says he'll do absolutely everything I ask him to do and more, but I'm not sure what to ask him to do because I don't know what he CAN do to fix this mess he's made?
Honestly, what can he do to make me forgive him for having sex with a prostitute??? (Because, omg...the mind movies are devastating!) I honestly, really, truly WANT to forgive him, I just don't know HOW!
Any suggestions?...
Me (BW): 39
WXH (1DumbHusband): 43
We were married for over 11 years; now divorced.
BIG D-Day: June 17th, 2013
Too many freaking TTs that cost us our marriage in the end.
"Love isn't a feeling, it's a choice."
LosferWords ( member #30369) posted at 10:59 PM on Saturday, August 17th, 2013
There's nothing he can really do to make you forgive him. It's more like continued and consistent actions from him, which will contribute to the process of forgiveness.
In the meantime, there are lots of things he can do... IC, MC, reading, digging deep to find out why he thought it was okay for him to cheat, and making himself a "safe" person to be in a relationship with.
I think a great starting point would be a very concise, yet intense book, called "How to Help Your Spouse Heal From Your Affair" by Linda MacDonald.
Best of luck to you both. 
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