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Divorce/Separation :
Meeting with AP's BW

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 kg201 (original poster member #40173) posted at 6:41 PM on Friday, August 30th, 2013

So here I go to have coffee with the AP's BW. She already knows and kicked the jerk out of their house, so it isn't about making a Dday for her.

We'll see where the conversation goes. I think she wants to mine me for information, although I don't have much myself. We'll see if there is potential for mutual support or not. I have met her twice before our ddays so at least we should be able to find each other in the restaurant.

I'll report back afterwards.

Me: BH, 40
Her: Ms. Daisy
Together 18 years, married 15+
LTA 3.5 years, living together
Dday: 7/28/13
Ds17, DS12, DD12
Divorced! 2/24/2015
Apology. You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means.

posts: 1155   ·   registered: Aug. 4th, 2013
id 6469007
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RyeBread ( member #37437) posted at 6:58 PM on Friday, August 30th, 2013

Best of luck to you kg201.

Let us know if it was productive.

ETA: or if its not too.

[This message edited by RyeBread at 1:15 PM, August 30th (Friday)]

Let him that would move the world first move himself. - Socrates

posts: 1058   ·   registered: Nov. 10th, 2012   ·   location: Midwest
id 6469028
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 kg201 (original poster member #40173) posted at 1:08 AM on Saturday, August 31st, 2013

It was a good meeting. We spent 2.5 hours talking about timeline and other things. Main takeaways:

1. The AP is more chickenshit than I gave him credit for.

2. According to the AP's wife, my WW was pushing the AP to separate from her the month leading up to Dday. Apparently he looked like shit, and the way she described him it sounded like he was having a nervous breakdown.

3. Apparently the AP told my wife the affair was over the night after I found out. Yet they still text and talk on the phone. He told his wife that my WW and he are just friends now and he is taking care of her health.

4. So #3 makes me wonder why my wife is so determined for a separation. My guesses are that a. She doesn't want to admit she put her eggs in the wrong basket (or as she put it "Kiss my ass" for the rest of her life). b. The AP is lying to his wife and the affair continues (although her description of his physical and emotional state makes me wonder if he is telling the truth). c. My wife needs space to figure out what the hell became of her life and her values.

So there it is. I am actually in a good space mentally. It was a good meeting. I love that the guy is such a nervous wreck (apparently the morning after I found out he had shut the windows in their house because he was afraid I was going to come over and tell her before he had a chance to. As if...Rapunzel, Rapunzel, let down your hair, so I can climb up and tell you 'bout an affair.)

Me: BH, 40
Her: Ms. Daisy
Together 18 years, married 15+
LTA 3.5 years, living together
Dday: 7/28/13
Ds17, DS12, DD12
Divorced! 2/24/2015
Apology. You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means.

posts: 1155   ·   registered: Aug. 4th, 2013
id 6469458
This Topic is Archived
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