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So I officially fired my lawyer. The last straw (after not addressing any of my concerns in mediation) was for him to get no attorney fees(I make 20% of what STBXH does) and volunteering to finish the divorce paperwork so other lawyer didn't have too. Then charging me for it and wanting additional $1000 for retainer.

I will seek the advice of another attorney in a couple of weeks. I could decide to let him complete the paperwork $1,000 probably.

OR, let STBXH lawyer do the da.. paperwork and let him pay for it.

The pros would be little $ cost to me.

The cons would be divorce delayed maybe? On one hand STBXH & OW#3 are engaged/living together and I know she wants to get married. On the other hand, I suspect STBXH is using me/divorce as an excuse not to get married. So I would not want to delay her happiness

The longer the divorce takes, it also helps because I don't have to pay for my health insurance.

I just don't want STBXH thinking I am delaying on purpose. I am mad about the shi. lawyer pulled and really can't/won't pay for so much more.

I have even thought of notifying the other lawyer that she can complete the paperwork. What do you all think?

Are you pro se now? If you're still technically represented, the other atty isn't allowed to talk to you.

If you're planning on retaining someone else, wait until you do so and let that person take care of it. I wouldn't worry about what your stbx thinks so much.It will all happen in due course anyway.

[This message edited by roughroadahead at 12:43 PM, September 13th (Friday)]

Currently I am pro se. As of now I am representing myself.

Met with a different laywer yesterday. In 1 hour (at 1/2 price of fired attorney) I got my questions answered and much advice. There were 2 major issues that were not even brought up to me by fired lawyer.

The new lawyer did say I probably got screwed out of $20,000 to $30,000. He then said it probably wasn't worth it to go after it, I agreed.

Strategy wise he thinks I should not retain him. And wait to see if STBXH lawyer draws up the paperwork. Every month not divorced means I am saving $650 for health/medical.

But while I like my $$$, I don't want STBXH thinking I am delaying because I still care, and I don't want him using not divorced so he can't marry OW#3. Right now he is probably real comfortable being engaged and living with her, but can't get married.

Can you all help me think of the pros and cons on how best to do this.

Also some things I learned:

1)after cs ends, I should go back to court to have my ss increased. There is only a 6 month window of opportunity to do that. He says the courts know that cs&ss is what is keeping me afloat, and if numbers stay same, the ss would increase. My lawyer did not tell me that and I would have never asked for the courts to review, I would have been afraid they would take it away.

Also while I requested (and of course was ignored) about life insurance policy, I can refile and get that back in when it expires in a couple of years.

Also when I got the emergency order for cs, ss the paperwork said starting on a date late in the month. STBXH was very quick to point that out and said I would not be getting $ on the first.

The new orders state payment on the first and that is when I should be receiving it. I had emailed STBXH that it was now due on 1st, he said he would continue to pay me later in month.

New lawyer says that for 1 hour work he can have STBXH wages garnished and I won't have to deal with him at all!

If he doesn't pay me on the first this next month, that is what I will be doing.

New lawyer says that for 1 hour work he can have STBXH wages garnished and I won't have to deal with him at all! Definitely do this!! One less issue to deal with!

I just don't want STBXH thinking I am delaying on purpose. Let him think whatever he wants. It sounds like it wouldn't make sense for you to retain another attorney if the issues that are on the table are things that have mandated calculations (cs and ss).

Forget about what he thinks and list the bottom line to see if it is worth retaining another attorney. For example, money saved on health insurance, is he paying the court ordered cs and ss? Are there any big issues like his pension, 401K?