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All of a sudden it's so wrong and I love!! Wtf

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 sad34 (original poster member #40358) posted at 5:39 PM on Friday, October 4th, 2013

That's what pisses me off the most I think. When ow phoned me because wh broke up with her for the 10th time I confronted him and boom throws her under the bus and says he hates her and loves me.

He wasn't even on anti depressants yet but realizes what a horrible mistake it was.

Ok, so for 4 years he couldn't live without this ditch pig and knew he was ruining his marriage. Then I make him text her and phone her and send her a no contact letter about how awful she is.

If our ws's can turn it off this fast then WTF did they see in them in the first place why was it worth potentially destroying everything.

Just seems insane!!!!! I'm still not sure about "r". So he could very well lose me.

Bs: me 32 WH: 36
Dday: July 2012
LTA: 4years (ea, pa)
Dd-4. Ds-2
My life is shattered unsure about R

posts: 142   ·   registered: Aug. 18th, 2013   ·   location: canada
id 6511082
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sodamnlost ( member #37190) posted at 5:42 PM on Friday, October 4th, 2013

I have that feeling all the time too ;(

It wasn't about HER though. It was about his own unique blend of fucked up ;(

Me - BS original Dday 10-2012, separated June 2014, divorce Fall 2016


Grief, loss and pain taunt her - "you will never be the same." Like a Phoenix rising from the ashes, she rises and spreads her new wings as she brushes off the ashes an

posts: 772   ·   registered: Oct. 19th, 2012   ·   location: Out of the ashes
id 6511085
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momwith2boys ( new member #37459) posted at 6:57 PM on Friday, October 4th, 2013

I wonder about that too. He says he didn't love her but I wonder if he I'd just telling me that to make me feel better or if it is really true. He said he knew it was wrong and wanted to stop but it became an addiction. He compared it to alcoholism. I wonder if he is just feeding me lines. He also said he was telling her what she wanted to hear so he can continue to cake eat!!

Me BW 35
husband 35
Married 10 years, together 13 years
OW-my so called "friend"
2 boys (7 & 3)
D-day 10/17/2012
D-day2-2/24/2013 told me it was her
D-day3-6/16/2013 found out affair never ended
Working on R

posts: 35   ·   registered: Nov. 12th, 2012
id 6511184
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TrustGone ( member #36654) posted at 10:11 PM on Friday, October 4th, 2013

I have wondered the same thing. How can they do it for so long and then just switch it off as to something they just did for the sex? No love involved according to WH. Maybe I could understand a LTA if they really loved each other, but to know he did it just for the sex makes me want to .

XWH#2-No longer my monkey Divorced 8/15, Now married to a wonderful man.
"A person is either an asset or a lesson"
"Changing who you are with does not change who you are"

posts: 10077   ·   registered: Aug. 30th, 2012   ·   location: Texas
id 6511399
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Kalliopeia ( member #35053) posted at 10:24 PM on Friday, October 4th, 2013

When there are multiple DD with the same person over a long period of time, I think there is attachment.

You made him do those things. I saw this so many times in my situation: when he was ready to give it up, he just did it himself.

posts: 478   ·   registered: Mar. 13th, 2012
id 6511406
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