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New Beginnings :
Advise on meeting the kids for the first time

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 Myname (original poster member #23138) posted at 1:32 AM on Monday, October 21st, 2013

So this upcoming weekend I will be meeting SO's kids for the first time. DD is 3, DS is 7.

I have talked to both of them on Skype a lot so this isn't really like a normal "1st time meeting". All of our Skype conversations have gone very smoothly and I've always managed to entertain them. Both the kids really like me and want to talk to me on Skype a couple of nights a week so I'm not worried about them liking me.

SO and I decided that it was time for me to meet them when her son made repeated requests to meet me in person.

SO is going to have a few things planned for us to do, like the zoo I think and other things like that.

Any words of wisdom for when I meet them this weekend? I have very little experience with kids so don't be afraid of insulting my intelligence.

DD: 1-14-09 EA/PA OM #1
TT: 5-11&12-09
DD#2: 5-18-09 EA OM #2
5-31-09: Told me she hasn't loved me.
No kids
Me BH: 45
12-08-10: S
Divorced and moved on with my life.

posts: 4060   ·   registered: Mar. 7th, 2009   ·   location: Inside your computer.
id 6531017
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LadyQ ( member #32847) posted at 1:54 AM on Monday, October 21st, 2013

One thing for sure, talk to them like they're real people! No baby talk. Ask them about their interests, and listen to the answers.

Tune out the noise of what others tell you about who you are and work it out for yourself...

posts: 1650   ·   registered: Jul. 21st, 2011
id 6531047
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welcome14 ( member #26741) posted at 2:42 AM on Monday, October 21st, 2013

I'm sure they are going to love you...I remember the pics of the baby bunnies you posted that you found while mowing..they would probably love those! Kids love bunnies, and zoos and add an ice cream and genuine people...sounds like you are going to be golden. Just keep it real, they will know if you don't. Kids have an innate emotional intelligence that far surpasses adult's.

Bs- me
Someone I used to know- Him
Nothing like a trail of blood to find your way back home- nikki sixx

I will love the light for it shows me the way, yet I will endure the darkness for it shows me the stars.

posts: 1566   ·   registered: Dec. 16th, 2009   ·   location: clarksville, tn/ Ft Campbell
id 6531100
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confused girl ( member #10649) posted at 4:14 AM on Monday, October 21st, 2013

Myname,

I was having a really crappy day so I bring up SI and I see this post and now I am crying happy tears.

You will be great, just be you. Enjoy them and they will enjoy you.

Love always hopes.

posts: 1426   ·   registered: May. 10th, 2006
id 6531185
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Kajem ( member #36134) posted at 5:07 AM on Monday, October 21st, 2013

Kids are people without life experiences to teach them. Listen to the, just like you would an adult. Remember the things that are important to them.... be yourself and you will enjoy them and they you. Kids can tell when someone is Bull shitt**g them. So treat them with respect and don't BS them.

Hugs,

K

I trust you is a better compliment than I love you, because you may not trust the person you love, but you can always love the person you trust. - UnknownRelationships are like sharing a book, it doesn't work if you're not on the same page.

posts: 6708   ·   registered: Jul. 15th, 2012   ·   location: Florida
id 6531215
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cmego ( member #30346) posted at 1:24 PM on Monday, October 21st, 2013

I recommend having a cool "trick in your pocket". Mine, I can fold a mean paper airplane. So, if we are stuck at a restaurant, I start folding the napkins, or kids are cranky, or bored, or you just want to connect with them...have a "trick" that kids love.

Magic trick?

Play I-spy?

Fold origami?

me...BS, 46 years old.
Divorced

posts: 4745   ·   registered: Dec. 9th, 2010   ·   location: South
id 6531362
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 Myname (original poster member #23138) posted at 1:51 PM on Monday, October 21st, 2013

I recommend having a cool "trick in your pocket".

Let's see, on Skype I've done several magic tricks, silly characters, and juggling all of which they ask for me to do again.

The more I think about this the more I think I will have no problem with this.

DD: 1-14-09 EA/PA OM #1
TT: 5-11&12-09
DD#2: 5-18-09 EA OM #2
5-31-09: Told me she hasn't loved me.
No kids
Me BH: 45
12-08-10: S
Divorced and moved on with my life.

posts: 4060   ·   registered: Mar. 7th, 2009   ·   location: Inside your computer.
id 6531381
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EvenKeel ( member #24210) posted at 6:42 PM on Monday, October 21st, 2013

Wow - what a cool post.

I am confident you will be fine too.

I had to chuckle about the "cool trick up your sleeve" thing. I had vision of you whipping out a pumpkin to crave.

posts: 6985   ·   registered: May. 31st, 2009   ·   location: Pennsylvania
id 6531795
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 Myname (original poster member #23138) posted at 7:08 PM on Monday, October 21st, 2013

I had vision of you whipping out a pumpkin to crave.

Yeah. I would be like hey check this trick out... 20 some odd hours later.

I'm actually doing one right now. I just started it. It is a very large pumpkin. I'm hoping I'm done by midnight but I don't know. I'll post pics down in F&G when I'm done.

DD: 1-14-09 EA/PA OM #1
TT: 5-11&12-09
DD#2: 5-18-09 EA OM #2
5-31-09: Told me she hasn't loved me.
No kids
Me BH: 45
12-08-10: S
Divorced and moved on with my life.

posts: 4060   ·   registered: Mar. 7th, 2009   ·   location: Inside your computer.
id 6531825
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Jen ( member #26584) posted at 2:03 AM on Wednesday, October 23rd, 2013

Be yourself ... Kids are like dogs they can smell fear and will react to it. Either by acting out, shutting down, being overly clingy to mom ...

Make the day about them, their comfort, their desires ect. The more comfortable they feel the better.

Consistency ... I can't stress that enough. I know it may seem hard to do this for a 1st time meeting, but do best to stay on their schedule and be consistent with what they know/familiar with.

Have Fun. Enjoy being a kid again, no better reason than hanging out with kids to act like a kid. Whenever you can, as often as you can, get on their level. Bend your knees and get eye level with them, instead of towering over them.

Me former Booger Bear ...
https://youtu.be/1TcLw3TOIN8
Hand Me Down MatchBox 20
https://youtu.be/iFdOAyyn76M
Love Falls by HellYeah

posts: 19991   ·   registered: Dec. 15th, 2009   ·   location: Where's the fucking rainbow ???
id 6533667
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Williesmom ( member #22870) posted at 1:27 PM on Wednesday, October 23rd, 2013

I see so much growth from you, Myname. I'm proud of you.

You can stuff your sorries in a sack, mister. -George Costanza
There is a special place in hell for women who don't help other women. - Madeleine Albright

posts: 9299   ·   registered: Feb. 15th, 2009   ·   location: Western PA
id 6533977
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