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In a couple of days I have to go to court re: modification of cs/ss due STBXH losing his job. I just had MAJOR surgery 2 weeks ago. Dr advised not going, but I have no lawyer and cannot afford one, so I will go.

Problem is I have always been taught you show court respect by wearing business (nice) clothing. Due to the surgery I can't fit into my clothes yet (swollen around my body) and the thought of putting on heals to go with any of my clothes gives me the shakes. So I think I will have to wear sweats.

Should I mention to the judge my dilemma. That I wanted to show respect to the courts, but just could not wear anything but sweats?

I don't want to get on the bad side of any judge.

Could you buy/borrow a loose-fitting dress instead? I'm thinking of a long, drapey dress, or even a sleeveless shell that you can then put a jacket or cardigan over. Not too dressy, but definitely better than sweats. You could then also get away with wearing flat shoes.

I think sweats would be a bad idea and you dont want to start off giving a bad impression.

Most definitely do not wear sweats to court. Not even fancy sweats. I agree, you need to wear a loose-fitting dress that you can put a jacket over, plus nice, dressy flat shoes. There is nothing you could say or do which would overcome the bad impression of showing up in sweats, yoga clothes, or anything of the like.

Your doctor recommended you not go. I would ask for a continuance (or whatever a delay of game is called in court) based on medical reasons. Call the clerks office and explain the situation and ask to reschedule.

I can't ask for continuance, the other lawyer says she will go and ask for continuance, but in the meantime she is going to ask for mod to STBXH ss/cs. I can't afford to get no $ and I have heard from 2 other lawyers that his attorney will lie. So I have to be there because if I am not there she can have things decided.

I have no one I can borrow clothes from. Most of my friends are much shorter than I.

I can't shop for anything. And the styles that would work, are not my styles so I have none in my closet.

Crap, I wonder if I can put together a toga out of a sheet and say I am ready for Halloween.

Go to Goodwill or another resale shop and find something that will work that is more appropriate.

If you spend more than $20 I'd be shocked.

You can then donate them back.

AJ's MOM

I agree with Ajsmom.

Goodwill or another local thrift store should have SOMEthing you can wear and at a very affordable price.

If you spend more than $20 I'd be shocked.

Even $20 would be steep - I just picked up a new dress for my DD there. It still had the tags on it. It was GW priced at $4.99 and marked half off of that so I paid a whopping $2.50 for a new dress.

I saw flowy summer dresses on clearance last week at Wal-Mart as well for $5.00. Pair it with a jacket (if you are in a cooler climate) and you are good to go or no-jacket if you are in a warmer area.

I definitely would not show up in court wearing sweats.

I understand money is a huge issue; but you really can't afford not to look respectful of the system.

I got all my maternity gear from Goodwill, all of it in very good condition. Buy a loose maternity dress, most of them have adjustable waists.

Some churches have clothes closets for just this very reason. Also, women's resource centers at colleges also have clothes closets for this purpose.

Figure out something else to wear besides sweats. Many judges will admonish you in open court for wearing attire that is not appropriate.

And, unfair as it may be, once a judge gets angry with someone over something like that they often stay angry and it can reflect in their rulings.

Must Survive, what size dress do you think would fit you right now? What is the current climate there? I'm sure we SIers can pull togther and find a solution for you.

[This message edited by neverdidithink at 1:47 PM, October 28th (Monday)]

Thanks you guys. I think I have a solution. I have a bunch of clothes that were in garage ready for Goodwill(so many mentioned Goodwill, it was like a lightbulb moment). In the stack is a dress that I no longer wear (too big, and didn't like). It has a belt (must remove because too tight). I can wear it with a pair of flats and I should be ok. Not going to be happy wearing nylons (ouch), but way better than sweats.

Thanks everyone. You guys are my go-to-peeps!

Nylons aren't necessary. In fact, no one wears them anymore, or so I'm told. If you want, you can wear "trouser socks", which are just thin nylon-like or tights-like knee socks. Those are often long enough to serve the purpose of smoothing your foot in your shoe as well as being a modest covering for your leg.

Nylons aren't necessary. In fact, no one wears them anymore, or so I'm told.

I agree. Don't worry about nylons at all.

I'm so glad you found something.

One thing that bailed me out in pregnancy -as opposed to sweats-was yoga pants. You can doctor them up with nice shirts and kind of make up your own style. They have long ones or capri style and that was what I lived in when my stomach or back couldn't stand other clothing.

They have black ones an navy too and if you did say black shoes and socks and then a nice shirt, you'd be good to go.

When I was a legal secretary, I saw some amazing outfits in court, from workers to public.

A few times I saw someone wear a dark plain t shirt with a short blazer, for a top, and it went off fine.

[This message edited by Ashland13 at 4:22 PM, October 28th (Monday)]

No need for Nylons. I haven't seen anyone wear them in years. Do they even still sell them? I don't see them in the stores anymore.

Agreed, don't bother with nylons. In fact if you insisted I'd say good luck finding them. Last time I did I had to search about 10 department stores. Few places even carry them, LOL.