SurvivingInfidelity.com^®

the condom aisle at the grocery store.

I was waiting to pick up the husband's prescription. I had to wait about 5 minutes next to the condoms. Thinking and wondering if he really used them, who bought them, why (to be safe or not to get her pregnant).

I have been in a rotten mood now the rest of the day. I've been rotten to my kids too. I'm so fucking stressed out.

What are your triggers today?

Triggers:

Holding hands with him in the car = thinking of him holding hands with SLUT.

A thread on here = he told me sex was bad...he is probably lying, and thinking of him and SLUT bag hav ing sex.

He found out about an event he wasn't invited to this past weekend because of his behavior at the conference where he had his ONS and he told me he was having a rough day because he was now it was a sharp reminder of what he's lost because of his actions (which included out of control alcoholism).

Yeah....thanks a bunch for that being what sends you off on your pity party....

I keep getting an email that says, Did you know that "___________" (my husband's name) is on Google+ ?

I sent my husband this message...

"Can you please tell me what Google+ is? I keep getting emails asking if I know that "_____" is on Google +. It is triggering me very badly. Whatever site it is, I don't want anything to do with it."

No matter how innocent it may turn out to be, it can't keep me from remembering that my WH spent quite a bit of time online with other women.

ANYTHING can be a trigger. I am just trying to keep it form affecting me too very much.

Once again- driving through her town on my way to work- driving through her town where the A took place. Everyday. Every morning and every afternoon. I drive through very effing day.

Yoghurt. Stupid right? But there's a new brand here in Australia and it's her name. And the advertising is everywhere. Can't escape.

My triggers started first thing when WH left a sweet and loving note next to the coffee pot. How can he feel those things and do what he did? He can't. He's trying, I call BS. (and that is bullsh/t, not betrayed spouse )

The name of a singer that sang songs that he posted for her. Someone said his name.

Yep, nearly 3 years out, it still happens.

I had one of H's OW's as a patient come into the clinic. She hasn't been in for about two months now (she has no idea who I am, never met H in person, didn't even know he was in a relationship when they sexted). Everytime I hear someone with that very common woman name at work, my ears perk up and I am scared I will be face-to-face with her. Again.

Happy fun times here. @@

Reliving a conversation from the past and we both hadtwo different opinions on how it happened/what was said. He had to hide the A for so long he had to hide lots of things in conversations...just triggered on maybe he hasn't fully recovered from that.

Seeing footies in my own sock drawer last nite. OW left footies for me to find. I went down the rabbit hole last nite with fWH trying to pull me back out. Things are better today. But it's really hard living in our house... full of triggers and I still can't believe he let her in our private home.

[This message edited by whattheh at 5:00 PM, November 5th (Tuesday)]

having my car detailed tomorrow so he is outside getting the random crap out . I found his pay as you go phone under the seat of my car where it had been hidden while not texting the cumguzzling c***s for 7 months. Dirty car is my trigger, cleaning my car is a trigger , having him clean car is a trigger. Thats why we do once a month full detail but its still a trigger

My IC is held every Monday afternoon. To get to IC office, I must pass by OW street.

so every Monday on my way there I trigger, and even though my IC sessions are good, I trigger again 60 minutes later on my return trip.

Second verse, same as the first!

WH is confused how what he did was a BAD IDEA and posted in Wayward. He doesn't connect how nearly identical what he's saying is to the justifications he gave me that I was the one in the wrong to keep him from going to his "support structure" and "friends" when I asked him to go NC with his last batch of EAs. "But what about my feelings?"

F*** this entire past week.

[This message edited by Reality at 6:55 PM, November 5th (Tuesday)]

A post in General about an OW with a motorcycle. It is easier to quote myself from that thread.

Women on motorcycles are a trigger for me, too. OW has a motorcycle in our sitch. Thought it would lure my FWH with its stupid motorcycle. Really??? If FWH wanted a motorcycle he would buy one. Doesn't need to sit on the back of yours like he's your bitch. Or better, did you really think he would feel like a man driving your motorcycle and that would lure him away from me? At least it would be sitting in the proper place that was, apparently, named after it. The bitch seat. What a c you next tuesday.

I am so sorry to any women that ride motorcylces here, but I really have a visceral negative reaction towards female's (even my sister-in-law) riding motorcycles.

His computer speakers. The sound quality today was horrible. I know he web cammed with at least one OW. I kept thinking about how terrible the sound must have been during their sessions.

My mum,

She's visiting from the other side of the world next week.

Each of last 2 visits, 2 years apart, he was in A's.

One afternoon, years ago, my mum quite innocently said, " Why did he lie to you just now?"

I had no idea and my mum is deaf so she wasn't listening to words she was watching his face and body language, and, yep, she was bloody right again. She always is...so looking forward to seeing her...so feeling sick

A pamphlet my son brought home from school today about "cyber safety". He told me to read this part about "sexting" because it was so funny. This is how it read:

"Sexting: DON'T DO IT. You may have heard stories at school or in the news about people "sexting" - sending nude photos from mobile phones. Don't do it. Period. People who create, forward or even save sexually explicit photos, videos or messages put their friendships and reputations at risk."

So where does my mind go? Their A started with sexts. TONS of photos. So I sent a picture of the paragraph and sent it to my husband with the caption, "See, even 3rd graders know better."

P.S. OMG hate the condom aisle! My H used cash to go to CVS and buy the condoms for his escapades with OW. I always wonder, did he stand there and study all the different types of condoms? Did he choose the ultra thin? The vibrating condom? I even remember him saying once that they sell vibrating condoms now at CVS and I was like "wow, that's crazy"...and I remember wondering why he was looking at the condoms since we don't use them?

WH traveling today. Him Skyping with our babies tonight - he barely had time to call before, but always had time to see that whore's ugly face every night via webcam

Song on the radio at work

Taking laundry to the hamper - he would go away on "business" for the weekend, and bring his dirty laundry home for me to clean

Wow, fewer than I realized today

If I don't have enough sleep I get in a bad mood the whole day thinking about the betrayal and cheating. This week has been rough for me. It's been affecting my mothering capabilities.