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General :
... 2 months until husband and OW reunite...

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 tara1110 (original poster member #41202) posted at 1:53 AM on Monday, November 25th, 2013

It's been 4 months since dday and 2 months until WH goes back to deployment and be reunited with OW. I have been doing better as far as not crying a lot for the past weeks. This morning, I woke up feeling really down today. It feels like the thought of them reuniting, hurts me more than finding out about the affair itself.... Why is that?

I just hope I wake up one day, and not have feelings for him anymore....

He betrayed me, he lied to me, he turned his back away from me and his son, he chose the OW to be his "forever"... There's plenty of reasons not to love him anymore yet I still have these stupid feelings for him. It's so stupid I wish there was a switch to just turn this off in an instant. Am I the only one who feels this way?

Just venting....

Me BS:34
H WS: 28
OW: 33 (butter face... Thanks to sistermilkshake for the nickname)
Dday: July 24, 2013 (5 days after our 5th wedding anniversary)
7yrs together, married for 5 yrs
Status: divorcing

posts: 86   ·   registered: Nov. 2nd, 2013   ·   location: North Carolina
id 6573475
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Mousse242 ( member #6330) posted at 2:01 AM on Monday, November 25th, 2013

Is this someone in the military too? Does his CO know what is going on?

posts: 5485   ·   registered: Jan. 27th, 2005   ·   location: Chicago
id 6573481
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phmh ( member #34146) posted at 2:05 AM on Monday, November 25th, 2013

Am I the only one who feels this way?

You're not the only one who feels/felt that way.

I still loved my XWH madly the day we signed the divorce papers, and I remember wishing for that switch.

However,if you could turn your emotions off like a switch you'd be a sociopath. As tempting as that sounds, it's really no way to live.

(((tara)))

Me: BW, divorced, now fabulous and happy!

Married: 11 years, no kids

Character is destiny

posts: 4993   ·   registered: Dec. 8th, 2011
id 6573483
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wontdefineme ( member #31421) posted at 2:14 AM on Monday, November 25th, 2013

Report them. You don't have enough time in that you would lose any retirement. Make sure his co knows, make sure you have access to his deposit while he is gone. But report them. Good luck, mine was deployed and while you are sacrificing they are taking care of themselves. Makes me sick for you.

posts: 2328   ·   registered: Mar. 5th, 2011
id 6573488
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 tara1110 (original poster member #41202) posted at 2:17 AM on Monday, November 25th, 2013

Mouse242

No the OW is a local overseas to where he will be deploying regularly (every 6 months) His CO doesn't know... I should have told on him a long time ago but I was hoping we could R after I found out... But he already made a choice and said that he doesn't want to be married anymore...

Thank you phmh

Me BS:34
H WS: 28
OW: 33 (butter face... Thanks to sistermilkshake for the nickname)
Dday: July 24, 2013 (5 days after our 5th wedding anniversary)
7yrs together, married for 5 yrs
Status: divorcing

posts: 86   ·   registered: Nov. 2nd, 2013   ·   location: North Carolina
id 6573491
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 tara1110 (original poster member #41202) posted at 2:32 AM on Monday, November 25th, 2013

Wontdefineme

Aside from the stress from the affair, right now, I am also struggling financially. As much as I wanna put is ass in trouble, it worries me also that he will lose his job and not be able to support our son (and his daughter from a relationship before me). He never was a jerk when it comes to giving us money. I'm just scared that once I tell on him, he'll be mad at me and will leave us dry. I am saving money so I can talk to a lawyer to help me out before he eventually leaves for deployment.

Me BS:34
H WS: 28
OW: 33 (butter face... Thanks to sistermilkshake for the nickname)
Dday: July 24, 2013 (5 days after our 5th wedding anniversary)
7yrs together, married for 5 yrs
Status: divorcing

posts: 86   ·   registered: Nov. 2nd, 2013   ·   location: North Carolina
id 6573503
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wontdefineme ( member #31421) posted at 4:16 AM on Monday, November 25th, 2013

They won't fire him. Contact co, explain that you know that he needs the job to support you and your child, but he needs to be aware of what is going on. Maybe he can stay stateside and he won't be able to go back to his ho. However, your lawyer will tell you not to. Mine lied in court and told judge I called his employer, I couldn't prove in didn't, I wished I had.

Make sure you you get the nastiest lawyer who can protect you. Make sure the money is garnished since he is overseas and can mess with you.

posts: 2328   ·   registered: Mar. 5th, 2011
id 6573581
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