SurvivingInfidelity.com^®

I am on here a lot and by that I mean 4-5 times a day. First thing I do when I wake is check the site while laying in bed. One of the last tbi gs I do at night is the same. Here is my issue the site sill sometimes exacerbate an issue I thought I'd moved past. I also tend to read and try to attach someone else's issue or label to myself especially if it makes me feel worse or look worse. I realize it and tell myself stop and do something else. I have labled myself a sex addict, porn addict, overall horrible person....I am none of these things. I am a whole person working to her healthy. So people, I am going to try to cut back my consumption. I will come on twice a day instead of 4-5. I will walk away from threads that make me anxious until I can handle them and I will live the life I am making for myself.

I am a whole person working to her healthy.

I will walk away from threads that make me anxious until I can handle them and I will live the life I am making for myself.

Sounds like good boundaries. You have done some truly awesome work, Unagie!

(((Unagie))) I really like you, sweetie, you have come so far. Please give yourself a break, you deserve it.

I understand, Unagie. I've scaled back too. I lurk but rarely post anymore. I find F&G to be the safest place for me these days. Do what you need to do so that you're well. That's more important.

You know I often wondered why people come here so much. I get it while an issue is going on but after a long period of time I wonder how/why they do it. I think it's great for veterans to be here to support each other and the newbies but honestly I think for me if after a period of time has gone by it would start to be unhelpful and remind me of the darker times. It's great to be helpful but you do need to put your own family and marriage first. I bet a lot of the members aren't around anymore because at some point you need to move past this chapter in your life. Don't get me wrong, I love the advice from the vets just not sure how they can keep it up.

I love the advice from the vets just not sure how they can keep it up.

I've heard it said that the greatest aspiration of the human heart is to help others.

I lurk a lot, post here and there.

I find breaks help too.

When we're away I don't come on... helps that I don't have a smart phone

Unagie you've come so far!! It's been a pleasure watching you grow!

Unagie, you are going through some tough stuff now. When I was struggling I frequently found SI to be a bit overwhelming. Take a little time away and them come back when you are ready. In the meantime hang out in F&G and have some fun.

I just stepped away for an unprecedented 2+ weeks. I needed to know Wayward could survive without me. And it did! SI was my Methodone when I needed to withdraw from AP heroin. Now I'm not sure what it is.

I was on SI a lot when I first found it. IC is once a week but SI is always there. Although the funny part is that what made me feel better wasn't just the help I got. Helping others was very good for me too. I took a step back from SI for some time. Lately I've been back.

(((Unagie))) good for you for stepping back! Take some time to take care of Unagie

Like you MJ, I too rarely post anymore, but I lurk here at least once a day, usually more. I started triggering quite a bit while typing responses to other's posts. I thought maybe I would take a break, work through it with my IC and post again when I feel ready. I think I jumped into healing at a pace I couldn't handle. But I'm getting there, taking things much slower than before, but in turn, getting some real results! Just took laying a few personal boundaries, and sticking with them. (Who knew... )

T/j 20wrongs, I was wondering where you had gotten to. Good to see you back! End t/j

I noticed I've had similar problems. I'd read a lot, make myself very depressed and worried, and then my day was ruined. If I just check two or three threads, it doesn't seem to put that much of a dent where I feel like my world is crashing.

I find I dont need SI quite as much lately, which is tremendous, but I kinda miss it and I want to know how people whose stories I've gotten to know are doing.

I am preparing to move and am trying to focus my "extra" time on that massive task, but I would like to lurk more and try to help too. I only have so much energy.

Unagie ... recognizing that you need to take a break from SI is healthy ... Lots of us have had to take breaks from or reduce our exposure to SI as it can become overwhelming. Please take whatever time away you need and them come back when you are ready.

HUFI