This Topic is Archived
ok2014 (original poster new member #42060) posted at 4:51 AM on Sunday, January 19th, 2014
Silly me thinking that my 180 was working and we were getting closer again. WH need last knight to clean his things letting me understand he was breacking up with OW like so many other time....Instead today WH introduces the OW to my DS without telling him or me ahead of time. Brings him home and drives away leaving DS to tell me. What a AH! I am devastated and almost hysterical.... I don't want a divorce!!! I might now or how stubid I have to be. He is in his affair fog upto his balls. Then he gets mad when I tell that I know so much about the OW,(it's all online and his computer anyway) HE INTRODUCED MY FAMILY TO HER, WH DROVE OW TO MY HOUSE!!! Am I nuts or just typical SI case.... I am lost and need help.
ME BS
HIM WH
2 teenage kids
Separated
Calls OW a leech......I just wonder what he calls me..
nomoredreams ( new member #41907) posted at 5:40 AM on Sunday, January 19th, 2014
I am so sorry for what you are going through...but your kids. God's strength and support for all of you. They do not deserve that. Prayers for you. nmd
crazynot ( member #24572) posted at 8:00 AM on Sunday, January 19th, 2014
That was an awful thing for him to do. How old are your kids? Old enough to choose whether or not to see him?
You've had a terrible blow... but gently, just to say as others will, the 180 is for you... it's not a recipe to bring back a WH. It's to help you detach so that you're not broadsided by his actions like this.
Try, try and try again to turn your thoughts from him. It sounds like he no longer lives with you, which does make it easier, though it won't feel like it now.
You can and will survive this. This is the worst point, work on accepting what's happening and making it matter to you less...
Me - 50
Him - 51
DDay 21 March 2009
Divorcing and delighted!
Do you want me to tell you something really subversive? Love is everything it's cracked up to be. That's why people are so cynical about it.
Skan ( member #35812) posted at 6:07 PM on Sunday, January 19th, 2014
Well, he's now shown you exactly who he is. An unremorseful asshole who intends to stay up to his balls in OW. I'm so sorry. He is playing you. Big time.
Let me tell you a secret. The worse thing in your life right now is not a divorce. The worse thing is to be the fall-back position, Plan B, the alternate, in your marriage. This is the position that he is putting you in. Right now, he has it all. You are at home for him taking care of the house and the children, existing on scraps that he negligently throws you, while he is living his Life O Lurve with his whore, excuse me, FauxWifey. Why should he change? He has it all. And he's going to keep on having it all, at you and your children's expense, until you change the rules.
You really, really need to see a lawyer ASAP. I personally would out him to my family and everyone else he's introduced the OW to. I would also contact OWs BH and tell him exactly what it going on. Nothing, nothing will change until you re-wright the rules. It's time to concentrate on doing whatever it takes to keep you and your children protected from his horrible decision to be an adulterer. OK2014, realize that he has introduced YOUR CHILD to his Ho to prep him to "gain" a new mommy. His intent is to replace you. He is NOT thinking about you at all, except as an inconvenience that he knows will soon be out of his life. You need to stand your ground and start fighting. It's hard. We all know it is. But you don't have to play by his rules. Start shaking his fantasy world up right now. Or you will be living this nightmare for a very long time and it will only get worse from this point on. (((hugs)))
Imagine a ship trying to set sail while towing an anchor. Cutting free is not a gift to the anchor. You must release that burden, not because the anchor is worthy, but because the ship is.
D-Day, June 10, 2012
This Topic is Archived