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Newest Member: mkei

Reconciliation :
Moving towards R

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 Aceofbase (original poster member #42458) posted at 4:21 PM on Tuesday, February 25th, 2014

My WW thinks that they were just Friends because they don't do anything physical. She doesn't understand that she was heading down a very dangerous path for your marriage.

We agreed that we should start reading the book "Not Just Friends by Shirley Glass. I bought a soft cover version she has the kindle version. She is reading the book. I have a positive sign. When I read this book I can empathizes with the way on unintended spouse find themselves in a horrible situation.

Thank you my SI friends.

[This message edited by Aceofbase at 12:23 PM, February 25th (Tuesday)]

DD: 12/18/2013
Status: R

Happiness is a choice.

posts: 149   ·   registered: Feb. 14th, 2014   ·   location: USA
id 6700568
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Deeply Scared ( Administrator #2) posted at 5:15 PM on Tuesday, February 25th, 2014

That's a really positive sign! I'm glad she's reading the book and it seems to be shedding some light for her

"Don't give up, the beginning is always the hardest." My Mom:)

My tolerance for stupid shit is getting less and less.

posts: 210060   ·   registered: May. 31st, 2002
id 6700653
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jo2love ( member #31528) posted at 10:44 PM on Tuesday, February 25th, 2014

It's great to hear that she is reading it. It is a great book.

posts: 51035   ·   registered: Mar. 16th, 2011
id 6701190
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LosferWords ( member #30369) posted at 12:50 AM on Wednesday, February 26th, 2014

That is a great start, Ace. This was the first "A" book that my wife and I read. We both had digital copies on our Kindles. I found it extremely helpful that we both were able to highlight and annotate different parts of the book and compare notes during and afterward. Best of luck to you and your wife.

posts: 31109   ·   registered: Dec. 11th, 2010
id 6701324
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Kyrie ( member #41825) posted at 1:47 AM on Wednesday, February 26th, 2014

So happy for you, Ace. The Glass book was one of the first books we read together. It took us a long time to get through it, though. I had to set aside at times because it would trigger me. But 2 years out now, I consider Shirley Glass a saint.

Our MC suggested that when we were ready, the next book to read is Hold Me Tight. We had to set it aside a few times, too, but eventually picked it up again when we were ready. It is a good next step book, IMO, but sometimes you have to take these books very, very slowly.

My H read the How to Help Your Betrayed Spouse Recover book. He ended up reading it a second time several months later and discovered more insights. I guess we're learning that these books need to be revisited as we grow through this process.

Blessings on you and your R.

Me: BW (49), WH (50)
Married 26 yrs, 2 teenagers
DD#1 01.20.12 when STD was discovered
Told it was 15 mo. PA ("just a fling") w/co-worker that ended in 2006
DD#2 04.06.14 duration of affair was actually 2yrs/8mo ("I love you's")

posts: 252   ·   registered: Dec. 29th, 2013   ·   location: southeast USA
id 6701398
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