SurvivingInfidelity.com^®

I started a new job almost two months ago. Last December I left the company I'd been with for four years for a work-at-home job. Well I found out working 100% from home was not for me. Really, really not for me. The workload was bad (overwhelming in fact) and the isolation of working from home so much was getting to be toxic. Found a new job. Still working from home most of the time but some direct interaction with co-workers. Better money and more responsibilities.

Now? Now I'm struggling with the stress of it. I'm trying to improve the situation with the project (part of the reason I was hired). I know these things can happen. I know this wasn't going to be without its problems. Still I'm finding myself missing the days when I was just another member of the team not burdened with the responsibility of the project's issues. Just worried about my own piece of it.

I've even been thinking about changing careers entirely. A friend pointed out that if I were back in a more traditional office environment I might not be having those thoughts. She might be right. Not sure what I need at this point. I know that my priority isn't money though. I like the fact that I'm making better money than I have before but ultimately I don't care that much about money. I want a life more than I want to earn money.

For now I'm going to try to take a step back, focus on the job at hand and reel in these thoughts. I need to maintain some resolve so I can do this job. I don't want to fail at it. More importantly I don't want to fear failing at it (if that makes sense). I could very well find this job is beyond my grasp. If it is then it is. Failing isn't the problem. Paralysis because of fear of failure is a problem. Better to try than not try. Maybe I'll succeed. Maybe I won't. Expressing this here does help. It demystifies it a bit. What can I say? I overthink things sometimes. It's my process. Thanks SI for being here for me.

((Brandon))

Another over-thinker here. That stuff will drive you nuts sometimes.

One step at a time.

Thank Williesmom.

That stuff will drive you nuts sometimes.

I know, right?

Funny but some of that anxiety started to ease off as soon as I wrote this out and posted it. Feels better to read your response too. For being a quiet, introverted person most of my life I am learning that I am much more of a people person than I ever realized.

For sure. I obsess over the stupidest shit. I obsess when I have nothing to obsess over.

I am an introvert also, but I like certain people.

I find that as I get older, I like some people more but the entire human race less.

I like a lot of people but I suck at remembering to stay connected. I lose track of time so easily and before I know it days into weeks and months and I've forgotten to reach out to them. I think I'm getting better at it. I hope so anyway.

I left a secure position for a new career opportunity almost two years ago. Much better money and for a project that I'm a subject matter expert in. I was regularly sure I made a mistake and ready to slit my wrists for the first 9-12 months. But I sucked it up and persevered (my screen name came in handy ;-)) and it has gradually gotten better. It's still a huge challenge but I now feel with the right effort I can handle it. I also have used my team building ability to connect with my team which has helped tremendously.

My point is that sometimes you just have to keep going and see where it leads you, then if it doesn't work, you know you've done all you could when you move on. Wish you all the best Brandon. :-)

Thanks Persevere!

I appreciate the support.

Brandon...

I'm 54, a geologist/engineer and I work at home... Or work from where ever I am... But ultimately, I work alone... It's not perfect, it has it's pluses and minuses... Don't allow it to keep you from being around people...

When I'm done working I go (or I did until I opened a 2nd homefront in Alabama) to happy hour and meet friends...

On success or failure...

I've had a lot of both... It comes with the territory in my business... I don't fear failing... I only fear repeating a mistake by ignoring or not remembering a lesson I learned before...

I learned to enjoy the game... I learned to actually play work as a game... Money is simply a scorecard...

You stumbling or tripping up isn't the end or anything... You'll have the oportunity to trip or stumble many more times in life... Get used to it... It's not the tripping or stumbling that really matter, it's all in how you stick the landing... Done with style, effort and grace "failing" is a great excercise in being human...

WB

Thanks WB!

Thing is I didn't use to have friends to be around. That is something I'm learning to change. Somewhat late in life but I'm learning. I was talking about this with my dad earlier. My world used to consist mostly of work and home (when I was still with my xww and step-daughter). Some interaction with family. Occasional movie with a friend. Other than that my "social life" as I laughingly could describe it was based out of the office.

Now things are starting to improve. I'm trying. It's not easy but I'm making some progress. You're right. I can't let work keep me from being around people.

Hope you're doing well.