SurvivingInfidelity.com^®

Yesterday I watched a couple that came into my take-out restaurant. They were both in their late 60's or thereabouts....

While they waited for their order she was chatting away to him and he had this look of utter adoration and love on his face. When they walked out it was with his arm around her shoulders and hers around his waist.

Seeing this made me want it too. I want to feel that excitement, the butterflies in my tummy, the 'I cant wait to be with you' feeling. I want to feel that I am loved, desired and cherished.

This is not a good place for me to be in right now, I am feeling very vulnerable and desperate for just some thing to make me feel like I am worth getting excited about.

I know the feeling, before DDAY when I saw an older couple walking and holding hands I'd smile and say 'That will be us one day' after DDAY it would break my heart. After talking to a good friend of mine who is older than me (her daughter is close to my age) I realized that some of these couples that we are jealous of have been through what we've been through and came out stronger. You're worth getting excited about and you will have that one day :)

We are in our 60s and although I'm still surprised when my H reminds me how old we look to the world outside, I'm shocked when people tell us how 'cute' we are or how much they want to be 'in love' like us when they're 'our age'.

And we have been dealing with the fallout of my husband's infidelity for almost five years.

You never know what goes on behind the curtains of a marriage. IMO, if you've made it 40 years living with one person, chances are pretty good you've hurt one another.....even broken each other's hearts, somehow --drugs, alcohol, money, lies, family bullshit and even infidelity.

All those years, you've had really good times together and really bad times together, but you both decided to work hard so you could make it, together. And that's the face the world sees....there's a lot more the world doesn't see.

I think every couple can have it, but they both have to really want it and work very hard at it and know it's not always roses and the thorns are a bitch, but when the roses bloom, the sweet scent is unforgettable.