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Hopeful74 (original poster member #44003) posted at 11:38 PM on Sunday, August 10th, 2014
Well it is Sunday and about a week since I started NC. I'm doing pretty good with it. My H has my lil ones this weekend and I have stayed pretty busy with friends and family. But today has been difficult for me. Can't shut my mind off from him and what he has done and what he is doing. I know that NC is supposed to help me but it really hurts that it doesn't faze him because he has someone. He doesn't give a shit that I am not in his life anymore because he just moved on to the next one. Before whoreface #2 (which he denies because, hey I am stupid and gonna totally believe that BS), he was all about spending time with me and and proving to me that he wants to be the man I deserve. It is so easy for him to just move on and leave me behind again, after months of empty promises. He tells me he is waiting for me, but I know it is all a smokescreen. Not sure why I am having such a hard time letting go, when I really know what he is now. I feel like the loser, as he goes about his merry way. And I am left here to pick up the pieces of my heart and my life. I know it shouldn't matter to me, as he is not building anything solid with anyone, but it is not easy being the one left behind AGAIN!! 
[This message edited by Hopeful74 at 5:41 PM, August 10th (Sunday)]
Me: BW
2 DD: 18 & 5; 1 DS: 10
Divorced May 2015
'Everytime you get up and get back in the race, one more small piece of you starts to fall into place.' -
caregiver9000 ( member #28622) posted at 12:23 AM on Monday, August 11th, 2014
(((hugs)))
I have the Sunday blues too, for completely different reasons.
His selfishness is not a reflection of your self worth. I hope your little ones are home soon and your home is full of the noise and distractions of a Monday.
Me: fortysomething, independent, happy,
XH "Stretch" (and Skew!) ;)
two kids, teens. Old enough I am truly NO CONTACT w/ NPD zebraduck
S 5/2010
D 12/2012
Hopeful74 (original poster member #44003) posted at 12:28 AM on Monday, August 11th, 2014
Thanks caregiver!! They got home about 30 minutes ago so now he is free to do whatever and whoever he wants! I feel a little bit better now that they are here. I think maybe the anticipation of them getting home and having to see him and his indifference toward me. He is so much better at the game than I am, which I really should be proud, I guess!
Me: BW
2 DD: 18 & 5; 1 DS: 10
Divorced May 2015
'Everytime you get up and get back in the race, one more small piece of you starts to fall into place.' -
caregiver9000 ( member #28622) posted at 12:35 AM on Monday, August 11th, 2014
hmmmm, not having something in common with an indifferent wayward? Yep, goes in the positive column! 
Glad to hear you are feeling better.
Me: fortysomething, independent, happy,
XH "Stretch" (and Skew!) ;)
two kids, teens. Old enough I am truly NO CONTACT w/ NPD zebraduck
S 5/2010
D 12/2012
Hopeful74 (original poster member #44003) posted at 1:11 AM on Monday, August 11th, 2014
Thanks again caregiver! Fighting the urge to go by the new ones place and blow his secret out of the water!! But I will not! Not my business anymore!! Can't wait til her husband finds out though. Because, if my gut feeling is right, this one is on her 3rs husband
Me: BW
2 DD: 18 & 5; 1 DS: 10
Divorced May 2015
'Everytime you get up and get back in the race, one more small piece of you starts to fall into place.' -
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