SurvivingInfidelity.com^®

I have not posted in ages, but M is at a crossroads. Had a big discussion tonight, "no intimacy" on my part (ie: cuddling, sex, etc)and she is lonely. Hard to be intimate when all she does is bitch and moan, has no time to even ask how my day was...hers is more important.

Admittedly, I have had ED probs for a couple of years, off and on. Job stress mostly. Got the little blue pill, but she seems to think I find her "unattractive" and complains constantly about her weight,even though she is HOT for 51. I tell her multiple times a day she look great, but with all the bitching she does about work, kids, etc, I admit I have withdrawn. However, she says sex five times in 6 months, not true. Rewriting history in her mind?

Anyway, last weekend, was out of town, texts were answered from her email? How do you do that, they were sent to her phone number. Can you sync email to text to hide it? I have the feeling (gut) she is up to the EA again, maybe PA, or more and hiding it. I asked about it yesterday, "I have no idea how that happened". Not a good sign I thought, gut screaming. Repeat?)

After the long discussion tonight, she goes to bed very early (no phone). I go up to 10 minutes later, and say can we fix this? Answer: "I don't know" My gut is screaming AFFAIR. The last time the EA started with her alone for the weekend, same circumstances.

Mine is to hire a PI and honestly, if true, done. Even if not, might be done anyway. Been married a long time, but I am just not going to jump through hoops for "I don't know". Thoughts?

If there is one thing I've learned it's to listen to your gut.

Do whatever you need to do to make a decision.

Good luck

My gut is screaming! I just don't feel comfortable, she has not said a word about any of these "feelings" til after I was gone for 4 days. WTF?

I have phoneleash installed on my WH phone. It is linked to my email, but can be linked to any. I can answer his texts through that email if I choose. Maybe that's how she answered the text?

My WH carried on both of his affairs using email to text OW. OW's idea. The emails show up as texts on OW phone and do not show up on phone bill ---at all.

After first affair, he admitted this was how they communicated.

I actually discovered hidden gmail account where he was sending emails as texts to her.

You may want to check email activity--if she's using google account, log in to her account, click on My Account, click on My Activity and it will show all activity

First, I'm sorry you're dealing with this. How infidelity is not illegal is baffling to me when you consider the destruction it causes.

Second, check for phone apps like Google Voice. It allows calls and texts that do not appear on a provider's bill AND can be accessed via email.

Third,save your money and trust your gut regardless of what you do or don't find. You have to ask yourself if you can really go through life with a "partner" you cannot trust and prompts you to 2nd guess everything that is said and done. Be honest, and fair, with yourself on this.

Good luck to you and be well.

All the major cell service providers have a mail address to which you can send an email - generally is like (ph number)@(provider).com

Google "send text via email" also my provider has a mailbox specifically for sending images

Look at your phone bill, credit card use, banking, mileage on car, try getting locate phone working - apple & android phs have the feature - androids usually on by default as apps use the data. Perhaps casual chat with friends may trip up something?

Psychyourself for "the Rollercoaster"