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Maisindu (original poster member #59249) posted at 1:47 AM on Wednesday, October 21st, 2020
It's been long since I've posted here. Last time everything was rosy pink.
3 years later it's all sinking in. He is back to being the workaholic money-living person he was before. No signs left of the man who wanted to make things up.
FIL died 2 years ago and monster in law (MIL) is as manipulative and intrusive as ever.
Me? Well I've been really daydreaming of a single, divorced life.
I do remember I used to want to re-marry. Well, not anymore.
Is it just a phase?
I've been pushing for MC but I really don't know if it'll be any good.
Me- BW- 44 Him-WH-53 27yr marriage 2003 EA, 2008 2 EA, 2016-2017 EA/PA 2024 new A
fareast ( Moderator #61555) posted at 3:13 AM on Wednesday, October 21st, 2020
Maisindu:
I am sorry you are back here, but having followed your journey I am not surprised. I believe you admitted that your M pre-A was not good, and it seems to have fallen back into that rut. You have to decide if his A is really a dealbreaker for you. I believe you rejected D as an option for a variety of reasons although I got the impression you were headed in that direction. Your children should be young adults now. Due to your M agreement and our laws your investment in property is in his name only. You also mentioned not wanting to return to your home country if you D. Are you still feeling trapped three years later? Why are you pushing for MC? Do you believe after the M was so bad before his A, and now with all of the A baggage added on, that you believe MC can actually help your relationship? Again, sorry you are here. Good luck.
[This message edited by fareast at 9:14 PM, October 20th (Tuesday)]
Never bother with things in your rearview mirror. Your best days are on the road in front of you.
mae19681995 ( member #57360) posted at 4:48 PM on Sunday, October 25th, 2020
Dear Maisindu, I am not familiar with your story, but was wondering if you and your spouse have attended MC before?
It is so easy to slip back into ruts and that does sounds what is happening. But, what my husband and I found was that MC helped us to recognize the signs of those ruts. It really helped us to reshape our marriage. But, it does take two. Both of you want to want reconciliation. Praying peace over you.
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