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Has anyone heard Jana Kramer's new song? Not sure how many of you on here know her story, but I personally think it is incredibly brave of her to share her struggles and truth in such a raw and honest way. She even wrote a book about her XH's infidelity.

I sat in my room Friday night sobbing as I heard her song. It is a song that so many of us can relate to on more than one level. Having children that have been greatly impacted by their father's infidelity.....it just makes me so so sad he is still not able to see how much children hurt from all of this. Especially his own children. As a BS, I feel like I was not the only one robbed of so much, but my children were as well.

"Once upon a time he loved me

Once upon a time I loved him too

It all fell apart in a moment

Lord, I wish it wasn't true

'Cause you deserve the perfect family

The fairytales you know so well

Instead of sitting here listening

To the story I wish I didn't have to tell"

Our children deserved better than this shit sandwich they now have to deal with for the rest of their lives and it is SO unfair. Sometimes I wonder if some WS really just don't care at all and how that is even possible. To just do things over and over an over again knowing you are deeply hurting others. My WS claims "he cares what he has done"....but honestly, I doubt that because his actions speak otherwise. He cares to the level he wants to care, not the level that his children deserve him to care.

Part of her song does give me hope.

"Now it's time to pick up all these broken pieces

So that we can be the story we believe in."

I guess I have to now look at what has been handed to us and know that the 3 of us deserve better. We deserve to be surrounded by real love, compassion and kindness. Not the selfishness and pain that has taken over our lives for so long. We now get control over our story and what we believe in. We have a new home, a great support system and each other. If my STBWXH chooses not to be part of my children's new story and what they want and believe in, the loss is his. I just don't see myself (as a mother) or my kids settling for less simply to make "him happy". He has stolen enough from us and what we once believed in.

[This message edited by Mari104 at 4:37 PM, Monday, February 28th]

  Moving to General

well I know her music and her story. But hasn't heard this. I watched the video with her and her kids in it and cried. It's beautiful and heart wrenching. ❤️ what a sad but hopeful song. Thanks for sharing.

Thank you Childofcheater for your response. This song just really hit home for me. I think so many WS almost feel like divorce is an "escape" from their consequences. They do not really reflect on how much their children's world is about to change. How much they have hurt other human beings. In many ways, the pain of their BS will be a pain they carry for the rest of their lives. Even so, they seem to care more about not having to face those they have hurt and deceived in a way they would have to if they were not to divorce. My STBWXH said to me that "he is now in a better place than he was before we last separated." I told him that is great that he feels this way. However, that may have a lot to do with the fact that he has basically cut everyone off that was making him take accountability for what he had done. (Parents, many friends, brother, etc.) He also barely sees our children and does not have to deal with the aftermath of what this has done to them like I do. So of course he is going to "feel better". He does what he wants, when he wants, with whom he wants. Has yet to face the true consequences of his actions. He doesn't help me with the children. Has no responsibility of being a dad. He is basically living a bachelor life with his mistress. He pissed me off when he said that, but I need to stop allowing the dumb things he says get to me. He is a egocentric, clueless a**.

Listening to her song and just knowing the lyrics were directed to her children just made me think so much of what my children have been through and that they do not deserve any of this. It just sucks.

[This message edited by Mari104 at 8:55 PM, Monday, March 7th]