Hi everyone
I thought this board would be best suited to me, im new here. Been reading lots of things and pinned posts, very very helpful. We are trying to reconcile.
Short version - husband had an EA - short but bad enough. Discovered in July. A friend.
Initially I was that devastated and I said I was ending it.it was just how he hid it all and other reasons, and what hes done.
After a period of a few weeks, I couldn't bear the thought of losing him as we have been together 13 years and I love him so much. It just hurts so bad.
We have gone through a difficult last 18mths in our marriage but its no excuse to go elsewhere for attention. Hes still had plenty of that including sex from me.
we have started the process of rebuilding. He is very remorseful and he is really trying. He sent a message to her cutting her off completely which i saw.
I have high anxiety and its just affected me so badly, I cant stop thinking about what hes done, what was said between them(hes told me ) ,but also if hes told me everything etc
Strange things are triggering me, songs, thoughts, places. Im worried about seeing her in places we go as shes local.
How can I get the thoughts away what do you do as a coping mechanism when trying to reconcile? Any advice much appreciated. I feel unvalued, I've hated myself that hes done this. The other woman is totally oposite to me, very social, bubbly, whereas im shy and reserved. Hes told me its nothing ive done or anything about me it was just an ego boost which he regrets.
Any advice much appreciated ty
