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She was acting weird as fuck so I took a look at her phone and sent message history to my email.

Well, holy fucking shitballs. Shes pregnant. She did a clearblue and shes 3 weeks. What a fucking idiot. Shes not admitted why but shes going to hospital to get rid.

Anyway, I've been in touch with lawyer. 180 going ok. Told her today the longer shes here to more I hate her. If she isnt out soon I wont be able to stand the sight of her. The message log I took had waaaay too much detail about their sex which I didn't need to see. But I guess, that helps detatch. Right now I really hate her.

She's told her OM that I wouldn't see her struggle and will always help her etc. She got that wrong. My kids wont go without, if she struggles they can come live with me. I will buy shit for them etc. But her, she can go fuck herself. Shes getting no more than I legally need to give her. When shes on her own, in a rented house without him or me or anyone. crying into her cornflakes because shes lonely and used, That'll make me smile.

What a horrid discovery. I'm so sorry. Strength and peace prayers being sent your way.

Oh Generic, those blows just keep on coming !! I'm so sorry you're having to deal with this. Your totally justifiable anger will fuel your strength in the coming days.

Copy everything you have found to your solicitor, her comments speak volumes to her mindset and will hopefully come back to bite her in court.

It's all about you and your children now. Stay strong.

[This message edited by earthangel at 6:00 AM, December 8th (Monday)]

From one of your earlier posts:

I said to her last night we need STD tested and she seemed shocked, said their used condom blah blah but fuck that.

Unless the OM has Harry-Houdini jizz, I think you caught her in another lie there...

Very sorry you had to find that out brother!

Vent here, let it out! Listen to music loudly, be by yourself and cry! Make sure you eat and drink plenty of water and are getting your rest! Then repeat!

Let it out man, vent about how shit is gonna be for her and what you wish you can do, vent..dont hold that shit in, but in reality dont worry about her worry about YOU! LETS TAKE CARE OF YOU FIRST BROTHER!

In looking back on that dreadful time, if I could reach back thru time to say something to myself that would have made it easier to bear, I would have said; "Time."

In a way, and you can make it this way, it is the simplest thing, and it really helps, under such immense stress, to go back to basics - to keep it simple.

^^^^^^ That was posted on another thread, and is something I try to remember brother. As hard and insane things must feel for you at the moment, do what you can to remember that!

If the anxiety and stress becomes to much, see your DR. brother. Stay strong man, stay strong!!! Your kids really need you.

If you can then don’t see these new pieces of information as “hits”.

Try to see them as confirmations or reaffirmations that you are on the right track.

So she’s pregnant. OK… Any chance it’s yours? That’s basically the only concern for you and even then it’s only relevant if and when she decides to keep the baby. Keep in mind that any child that’s conceived while you are married is by default yours and paternity needs to be contested. But that’s way far down the road.

If not then just remember that getting pregnant is always a risk when having sex, even if condoms are used. Plus her lie that they used condoms is no better or worse than any other lie she told you. It’s just confirmation that despite the pain then you are better off without her from now on.

Unfortunately the chat log was full of descriptions of the sex acts they have done and how much they enjoy it.

Full of cunnilingus, blowjobs and unprotected sex at a detailed level. That is my curse for taking the messages. Stuff I cannot unread.

I have had a chat with my lawyer today and meeting her tomorrow. Apparently taking the messages was pointless and just harmed myself for nothing. Although i suppose the pregnancy info is something I should know! My lawyer said due to computer misuse act, I cannot use that evidence.

I need to play it cool. Not start any wars and just get my advice sorted. I can see this getting expensive :S

I believe there's a work around that act. My MIL works for a big company. The company provided work cell phones for the very reason they couldn't monitor content of personally paid phones but since they were paying for the work phones they could. Employees were advised any improper texting or website use could result in termination. If you pay the bill, or in the least since you two are still legally married at this point, shouldn't that give you the same rights / loophole of that act as the company my MIL works for? It's a thought. Something to ask the attorney to at least look into.

Take all the drugs and alcohol out of the house. Find everything thing she's hidden and get rid of it. I'm not so sure I'd believe her about the pregnancy either, I'd have to have proof. Sounds like to me she doing everything to hurt you and make you leave. You need to be doing the same.

Deny her pills and alcohol in YOUR house, make her go elsewhere.

Make no mistake, this is a war.

If she is at home follow her around taking videos. Sooner or later she'll freak out. It is a battle of wills, you against them. Deny her every comfort you can, make living in YOUR house miserable. For you're own sanity you need to get her out of the house, and she is thinking the same thing about you, believe me.

Take a liking to AC/DC at full column, block the heating vents to her room, hide all the toilet paper, put a dead fish under her bed,...quit playing by her rules.

twisted

The pregnancy thing came from me looking at her phone. She hasn't told me. She went to doc this morning and muttered soemthing about period pain then when she came back said she is getting checked for cist on overy. However her phone had a photo of a positive pregnancy test sent to OM and lots of surrounding chat.

Plenty other hurtful stuff too which I wont go over.

So what if there was detail? It’s just confirmation that you are on the right track.

What did you expect them to do; have unexciting, uneventful sex?

It’s simply confirmation of what you already know: You are lucky to be getting out.

Generic: is WW on your medical plan at the present time? I believe that if she is, you are entitled to see the billing records (I.e., pregnancy test, sonogram, etc.), but not the results of any such testing due to HIPA laws. Nevertheless, the bills themselves should inform you as to what's going on, and should constitute admissible evidence in your D proceeding.

we are in Scotland, she is using NHS. I think she is pregnant, saw photo of test in her hand. She hasn't told me though, just discussed in detail with him.

Also in Scotland, any court proceding requires 2 pieces of evidence (unlike England) to make it to court. lawyer doesn't seem worried though.

Generic....wtf....grrr...and hugs

file:///C:/Users/Drafting%20X/Downloads/cm18.pdf

I'm not sure this is still current, you should definitely check with your lawyer. I would think you may be able to bring a suit against the WW's "paramour" for damages, or in the least for expenses of the divorce costs.

Generic

If your wife is drinking that much now you need to what is necessary to protect your kids.

That should be your priority.

HM

She admitted pregnancy to me this morning, only because she was throwing up in bathroom. Admitted the abortion date etc.

I've tried really hard to keep this amicable for the kids. Also trying to retain as much custody of kids as possible. my whiole life for 6 years has been my family. I dont buy myself stuff or spend much time away on nights out etc. I work like crazy and spend as much time as I can with them. This woman has broken that family and shows me how little morals she now has.

She crying expecting sympathy over pregnancy, but all i feel is hate. No more nice guy, no more trying to keep it amicable. I have lawyer appointment this afternoon and I am going down the straight down the middle route, but might put in a cheeky attempt at full custody (no chance of winning that in this country), but it may make half custody more appealing to her.

I dont care if she is left living in a shithole with no money, not my problem.

Stay strong.

Go big or go home.

Keep documenting everything brother.

Your roller coaster ride is about to get more hectic man, so prepare yourself for that! Always remember that nomatter the anger or down feelings are normal! The hits keep coming, so its gonna be normal to jump from highs to lows man. DETACH DETACH and DETACH and 180. Its all about you and your kids at this moment!

my whiole life for 6 years has been my family. I dont buy myself stuff or spend much time away on nights out etc. I work like crazy and spend as much time as I can with them

^^^^^ I think many of us here can relate to this. Dont feel like you need to make all your decisions TODAY! dont do that to yourself man, Give time TIME brother! Set your game plan and stick to it. MUST INCLUDE 180 AND DETACH!!! We are here for you, take care of yourself, EAT!! keep posting.

Stay strong!

Was she able to rent that other house with her dad on the lease?