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NaiveAgain ( member #20849) posted at 2:57 AM on Friday, September 27th, 2013
Can you block his cell #.
Yes, the beginning withdrawal is the worst. It gets easier over time.
And here I am thinking I can save his soul.
His soul isn't yours to save, and he is old enough to make his own choices.
He texted me today out of the blue asking me to come to church
Okay. Enough is enough. That is cruel. He knows you saw him with that other chick. He was all into her one day, and then another day he is back to texting you? I don't think so. You aren't anyone's backup.
You can do better, you know it, but the heart wants what it wants. NC, get over the withdrawal and let your heart heal. Make room for something better.....
Original WS D-Day July 10, 2008. Kept lying, he is gone.
New WS (2 EA's, no PA) 12-3-13
If you don't like where you are, then change it. You are not a tree.
fraeuken (original poster member #30742) posted at 4:06 AM on Friday, September 27th, 2013
Number blocked again.I am a basket case. My boss, whom I have known for 15 years and who is a good friend saw me break down today. He was there for me all the way and gave me the 'talk' about how I deserve better. 'Tomorrow is another day. Why is this hitting me so hard? I cannot figure this out. I am for sure grabbing the cat tonight whether he wants to sleep indoors or not :-)
[This message edited by fraeuken at 10:11 PM, September 26th (Thursday)]
Temporarily independent with the whole world at my feet.
NaiveAgain ( member #20849) posted at 6:51 PM on Friday, September 27th, 2013
((((hugs)))) just hugs. I know how hard the withdrawal is. It sucks. Hang in there! Snuggle with your kitty cat, cry when you need to, have some chocolate mousse ice cream.....
It gets better.
Original WS D-Day July 10, 2008. Kept lying, he is gone.
New WS (2 EA's, no PA) 12-3-13
If you don't like where you are, then change it. You are not a tree.
heartbroken30 ( member #18437) posted at 8:16 PM on Friday, September 27th, 2013
Hope you are feeling better today xoxo
Me - BS 42
Kids 12 and 9
Divorced
fraeuken (original poster member #30742) posted at 6:19 PM on Saturday, September 28th, 2013
Feeling better. Went out to a concert last night, made a new friend and my weekend is fully booked with activities.
And when the pain suddenly washes over me, I am managing to breathe through it right now.
[This message edited by fraeuken at 12:19 PM, September 28th (Saturday)]
Temporarily independent with the whole world at my feet.
Random thoughts ( member #2959) posted at 7:51 PM on Saturday, September 28th, 2013
When those feelings of missing him arises might I suggest grab pen & paper and write down all the red flags that has spouted out and those you saw and overlooked.
Those three words are said too much and not enough.Chasing Cars-Snow Patrol.FWW
missherlots ( member #30591) posted at 2:32 AM on Sunday, September 29th, 2013
Just as a note:
There is a reason why you feel as such. You are having a withdraw chemical desired.
The exact name of your question is: Heartbroken syndrome. It is as hard to break off from any other drugs, the only problem is that this drug is good when you are ok with your partner…….
You can research on it and will find out that it is real. So, at least you have the answer you were looking for. It is not your head screwing with you, or your heart not listening to your head. It is a brain chemical process. You can just research on it. it will help you to understand better your desire for him. One more thing, it is proven that an emotion last about 35 seconds. It is intense and hard to control but, whatever you feel after those 35 seconds it’s create by your personal desires of satisfaction. The way to get inside that process is this. You seat in a place calm and relaxed then you think about your feelings and how your body reacts to it. Be aware of the process of your mind but do not judge it, just let it be. It will create understanding and wisdom to overcome the emotions when it comes back. In other words, you meditate on it.
I hope it helps.
Just my two cents.
Pain and suffering is part of life, but I choose to feel love and compassion for all people excluding no one.
trebleclef ( member #33488) posted at 9:17 PM on Monday, September 30th, 2013
One of the best pieces of advice I had during this emotional tsunami was from my very wise big brother, who said, " Write a statement for yourself. Write down your decision, your reasons for making it, along with a clause that says you will NOT revoke that decision no matter what, unless you AND those around you who care about you can CLEARLY see that it would be in your best interest. Sign and date it. Stop re-thinking. Put it away and look at it if/when your heart gets hungry."
I did this and it literally stopped me from flying back into his arms and bed on numerous occasions.
True remorse isn't followed by a "but".
fraeuken (original poster member #30742) posted at 11:20 PM on Monday, September 30th, 2013
Thanks, guys/gals. I am getting better every day with the help of caring friends and me-time which I really haven't had the past four months that I was with him. It was either him or the kids. So, being able to veg on the couch, cooking myself my favorite food, watching all the latest season premieres without having to worry about him not being entertained was refreshing to say the least.
I just gave notice to my renter too. Hopefully 60 days from now I can get my hands on her rooms, paint, replace the carpets and turn them into my office and sanctuary.
Temporarily independent with the whole world at my feet.
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