SurvivingInfidelity.com^®

The early mornings are the worst for me. My mind wakes me up and wants to go over stuff. Process things. Sometimes I come to great conclusions. Sometimes I talk myself into coping. Sometimes I get myself out of bed and make my mind think about something different.

I really like it when I come to conclusions. I feel a sense of peace.

It's first thing in the morning. I used to love that time too. I would get up and read or watch something on TV. Just enjoy that everyone is home and at peace. Now I can't do that because she is on the couch and there is no peace.

On the hour drive to work. When I help students who I think my husband would fancy. On my breaks. On my lunch. On the 1 1/2 drive home. When I get home. In the shower. When I go to bed. I've learned not to say anything anymore..After almost a year, it's now my problem, not his.

I have had so many triggers since DD July 2012. For the first 10 months the hardest time for me was evening when I was trying to fall asleep but during the affair I didn't live with my BF and after we saw each other or talked to each other for the last time in the evening before going to sleep is when he would have the A activity. I also hate weekend mornings b/c I can flash back to times I was out of town or not with him and would call him on a Sat/Sun morning and he would answer like a stranger and at the time I thought someone was there but he would make me feel like I was crazy. Now that I know the truth it is all of the times that I knew he spent time with her that are triggers for me. They cause me major anxiety and have been so bad at times I get a full blown panic attack.