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Newest Member: johnnygr

Divorce/Separation :
how can they not get it?

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Dawn58 ( member #37656) posted at 3:24 PM on Saturday, November 2nd, 2013

They simply do not get it and that sucks. For my own sanity, I have had no contact with the POS for months now. We don't have any kids and I go through the attorneys if there's a financial issue. I changed my phone numbers and blocked his emails and my life is much calmer. I need to give myself that space. I will not tolerate anymore of his lies and the he is lying on so much of the legal paperwork I have been receiving. I am just going to stick with the facts,even though my emotions are screaming, My outrage at what he has done, breaking the marital vows that we took. There are no consequences for breaking that contract. He had the affair and there have been absolutely no consequences for his actions. It does piss me off. Life is not fair......

I got into the marriage, because I loved him. I got out of the marriage, because I love me.

posts: 491   ·   registered: Nov. 30th, 2012   ·   location: Southern California
id 6547185
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gonnabe2016 ( member #34823) posted at 5:48 PM on Saturday, November 2nd, 2013

Fly -- you are missing a very important point here. Your stbxww has a court-mandated order of protection against you. I don't know what the exact parameters of your order are or what kind of exceptions it gives you as far as dealing with 'necessary' issues -- such as kid placement, etc.-- but, dude. It sounds as if you broke that order and the judge gave you a break. I'll bet that it was within his discretion to impose some type of sanction on you right then and there. And he let you off with an admonishment and an extension of the order. I imagine that he *sees* exactly what is going on -- but he can only deal with the issue in front of him.

Your stbxww can text/email 100 vitriolic rants to you a day. You are not allowed to respond. She can show up on your doorstep with your paper and coffee every single day. And you have to keep your mouth shut. Your order doesn't have fine print that says *unless she 'starts' it*, kwim?

Stop taking her bait. It's not going to end well for you....you are playing *her* game. You are playing right into her hands. She's giving you rope and you're using it to hang yourself. Stop it. Foiling her *game* will feel much better in the long run.

"Oh, what a tangled web we weave when first we practice to deceive." - Sir Walter Scott

In my effort to be *concise*, I often come off as blunt and harsh. Sorry, don't mean to be offensive.

posts: 9241   ·   registered: Feb. 15th, 2012   ·   location: Midwest
id 6547318
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