SurvivingInfidelity.com^®

I know someone else asked and you didn't answer, but are you getting help for your alcoholism?

Also I'm sorry if I'm mistaken but isn't it your dad's house? If he wants her to clean, I'm not sure what right you have to get mad about that.

Been thinking about your post today, G.

I get that this pisses you off and you need to vent that frustration off.

But there's more going on here. there's a family dynamic that you've all been conditioned to and everyone is playing their part beautifully and predictably.

At some point, you might want to ask yourself if you just want to keep playing the part or if you want to write yourself a new part. Because you can if you want to. For me, that new part would start by saying, fuck them. And then go do something else. You can have any part in life that you want. You just have to decide what it is and start playing that part until it feels natural. Your family members that have been conditioned to see you in a certain light will be the last to recognize this. That's how it works. But fuck them, you don't change for them, you change for you.

You seek out alcohol when you feel low. That's another part that needs to be rewritten. I hope you have found a program to help you with this.

((((G23))))

I'm sorry if I'm mistaken but isn't it your dad's house? If he wants her to clean, I'm not sure what right you have to get mad about that.

That is the logic she used too.

See? The PROBLEM is is that she doesn't live here and I do. If she wanted to help our father, include me not just show up and micromanage the whole thing as if I was an imbecile.

Yes, I had sought out Guinness when I had felt low. BUT I have SEVERELY cut back and I don't need 12 steps to prove that I have been hurting myself with it and it needs to go. I have analyzed why I do this and have been on AA online. I revoked my right to casually tie one on and I know that. I fell off the wagon with this episode because my sister brings it out in me which I am not proud of and this was the final confrontation during PMS to make me flip. I have made HUGE strides since I posted on SI about my Guinness problem. The noose around my neck that will keep everyone wondering whether I am a still a lush is my user name I can't change. If I have posted here without posting drunk (and you all would know that) chalk it up to me moving in the right direction with it.

Thank you all for responding.

At some point, you might want to ask yourself if you just want to keep playing the part or if you want to write yourself a new part. Because you can if you want to.

Yes, Tesla, I thought about this today and you are right. I am not what she feels I am but what God says I am and that makes me be able to say fuck their attitudes and displeasure at me.

I'm sorry my gut reaction seems to always want to feel respect from my family regardless of whose house it is. I guess that is asking the sun to come out at night. She wanted to barge into the house I lost to foreclosure and mircromanage it, too, if I had lived closer. She has no boundaries and my father plays into her hands.

Fuck it. I've already told her to come by to clean during the week while I sit and get a suntan or eat bon-bons

Mods, please lock this thread.

Thank you

I want you to prepare yourself that getting healthy for you, and that would include emotional health as well as physical & financial health, may result in you losing your family, or at least some members of your family. That is certainly how things have played out for me.

oops

[This message edited by Nature_Girl at 1:01 AM, June 30th (Monday)]

I'm sorry but your sister didn't make you fall off the wagon. Your an alcoholic and that's how you cope.

And that's the same logic she used because that's true. I would be incensed if I had allowed someone to be a guest in my home and then they threw a fit if I wanted someone to come over to clean it. I would tell them if they didn't like it they are free to leave. You are a guest in your father's home. He is doing you a favor. It doesn't matter if you agree if he wants your sister to clean HIS home.

Please seek help.

I want you to prepare yourself that getting healthy for you, and that would include emotional health as well as physical & financial health, may result in you losing your family, or at least some members of your family.

Thank you, Nature Girl. I am already seeing this.

I'm sorry but your sister didn't make you fall off the wagon. Your an alcoholic and that's how you cope.

Please seek help.

God, I hope you aren't a nurse, Hummingbird!!!! In AA, NO ONE tells a recovering alcoholic THIS.

[This message edited by Guinness23 at 5:27 AM, June 30th (Monday)]

Again, Mods, PLEASE lock this thread