SurvivingInfidelity.com^®

OK, I compromised between a bunny boiler (saw that somewhere here and lol!) and a dignified FU!

I took all of his clothes to his car and dumped them inside. Just left a note that said here, please leave me alone for a while. It's a big parking lot and I wouldn't have done it if I thought a large scene would embarass me. But in my head I was posting large signs on his car and her car (if I could find it) about cheating, homewrecking sluts and great big assholes. And leaving his clothes strewn across the parking lot. It was an enjoyable thought.

I am having the locks changed. I also opened single accounts and have transferred money. What I am scared of is that I retired early last year (at his urging) due to some health issues. So I have a pension, but he is the main bread winner. If he decides not to pay the bills, I am screwed. I am so scared!!

Last week when he was pretending he cared, he signed a paper which said we would continue financial matters as they had been for 15 years. He seemed to understand how scared I was about being left completely high and dry. You know when he didn't know what he wanted, but he loved me and didn't want to hurt me? yada yadda

I think now that the slut has her own place, he decided that was better and may just ignore it.

Wanted to add I have an appointment with a lawyer, but it's next week. I do have the right to change the locks since he chose to leave.

I also did the credit check thing, but it was actually to see if I could find the burner phone he had. I hoped that the company would have done an inquiry and I could get proof he had it but couldn't find anything.

I would have liked to leave it on the OW's lawn, but I don't know who she is or where she lives. my lawn would be boring because we live in the country and nobody would see it.

Dammit, I was at work and couldn't reply back before you brought his clothes to him.

He's not going to see that as a mean or nasty move on your part, he's going to thank you for doing his work FOR him and bringing his stuff right to him. Zero effort expended on his part.

Do NOT bring him any more shit. Ever again.

Tell him the NEXT time he needs something from the house, it needs to be scheduled so you can prepare to have a cop on the premises in case his sorry ass tries to take some of your property while he's in the house getting his stuff.

No more Mrs. Nice Guy, driving his crap to him. He's such an assclown, he'll just see that as you doing his bidding.

Ok that wasn't too bad and it keeps him away from the house. Try to steer things so communication is thru email only. It gives you time to digest what he wrote and time to respond the way you want. And time to freak out in private, if need be, before you respond.

That's exactly what I want right now, just my own time to not be afraid of what horrible thing he is going to do to me next.

I will have the sheriff there from now on. NeverAgain2013, that was a good idea. I need to have the lawyer visit to make sure I do what I am legally entitled to do. I know I can change the locks, but that's about it. What's sad is that I still have some values and morals and don't really want to do anything illegal or immoral. Wish he had thought that way.

I was just so mad. I had to do something, whether it made it easier for him or not. I just am so angry that he could do this. You all know, it's like someone took every bit of control from me and now I am just some piece of furniture he can do whatever with.

I will say he has called four times since he got off work and I have not answered once. Screw him!!!

I completely lost it, not long after D day. I'd made a new discovery and it just pushed me over the edge. Just know that you aren't alone in feeling this kind of anger.

So he now has his clothing. When the time comes for him to get the rest of his things, definitely have the sheriff there.

You are doing great in not answering his calls! You are right - screw him. You have the right attitude and while I know this is all very painful, it is obvious that you are a very strong woman. You will get through this - keep posting and big hugs!

(((blindsided)))

I wouldn't as it would just make you look like a looney bird. Just box them up and put them outside..close to the trash cans.