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Newest Member: FaithGrace

New Beginnings :
XH and OW getting married

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Fablegirl ( member #56784) posted at 1:56 AM on Monday, December 9th, 2019

Everyone is happy when they are planning a wedding. It's a great distraction from all that is wrong with them. Growing old together and the routines of marriage settle on everyone eventually. You carry on with the dignity and strength you have already demonstrated. Be kind and loving to yourself and don't forget self care.

posts: 250   ·   registered: Jan. 9th, 2017   ·   location: Mid Atlantic
id 8479422
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taken4granted ( member #61971) posted at 11:21 PM on Monday, December 9th, 2019

Reading all the other people's responses reminds me of a mom's group I belonged to when my girls were young. Another mom was complaining about how everyone looked so put together and she was struggling just to keep her kids from streaking up and down the street. We reminded her that people can put on an act for a while, but all those "well put together moms" could have a real mess at home and don't judge yourself by others.

That said, I know it's hard. Feel pity for the other woman. One of the women I work with told me that her cheating ex married the other woman shortly after they divorced. They ended up divorcing too and she and the now ex wife are still friends. Who knows.... you may find a kindred spirit in her when his mask starts to slip. Remind yourself daily that you're free and she's starting her own hell. No matter how hard you work or how unfair it all may seem, you have been given the gift of freedom from an NPD (as you describe).

Hugs to you. You will get through it. I promise. And when you're planing your wedding to some magnificent guy that deserves you, his will already be falling apart.

"If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything." - Mark Twain
Me: Living life! Him: Not my problem anymore
Married 15 yrs.
1 LTA, Many EAs from 2009 - ?
Dday 1 = 6/16/17
Last Dday = 1/4/18
Started loving myself 2018!

posts: 408   ·   registered: Dec. 27th, 2017   ·   location: OH
id 8479952
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