SurvivingInfidelity.com^®

So sad for all of you, what is wrong with these people? Mine was feeling the guilt of his a. Breaking down crying all the time. Couldn't sleep, no erections. I was so frantic and worried. Making and taking him to dr. Appt and even a sleep study. Racking up medical bills when all along he knew it was guilt. I was holding and caring for him as he was crying about ending his a. I was so sick when I later connected the dots.

WH spent Christmas with OW while I cooked dinner. He came home and started a fight with our children so he could go hide in his home office. He still claims he was at an office party that he'd been invited to the day before. I even told him that going to this party instead of spending Christmas with his family was absurd. I asked, "who does that?" Now I know, men who are lying to their wives and spending Christmas with the OW. I had no idea he was having an A. No one believes there was a Christmas party at the office. Not the boss's personal assistant. Not his ex-wife. No one. WH claims no one will admit to being at the party because there were strippers there. But WH is sticking to his story after 2 1/2 years even though he knows no one believes him. He knows how outrageous his behavior was and he will never admit to it.

[This message edited by Ladyogilvy at 7:35 PM, May 25th (Saturday)]

So many...here's a "good one":

-bringing Ow's immediate relative to "our" house while we were all home to do home improvement projects.

-bringing resources to "our" house from OW's tribe, thinking we would willing use stuff;

-using "our" computers for use of OW...how to get the ick off?;

-stealing my pictures and letting OW put them on her social networks and cutting me out...inc. "our" deceased family dog;

-spending almost $1000 for false counseling when he finally told me it was a "ruse"; that's not his portion, when we are in financial jeopardy

-making profiles on dating sites from our home while we were home;

-sneak-calling every relative I have to tell them he was leaving but not telling me-I had to hear it from OW;

-going to my place of employment the day I left-they never called again;

-calling me "emotionally crippled";

-hearing from his L and not him he wants to sell "our" house;

-being intimate with me and telling me he was done with OW but he wasn't; telling me he cheated on her with his own wife (you all know the rest of that)

-texting her from my birthday party while getting my cake

-texting during holiday celebrations while pretending to R

-telling me he was glad she told me because he probably wouldn't...wtf?

Sooooo many things. Sorry, I couldn't pick just one. Yes, there is more.

correction: he went to my place of employment, not me.

To many to count but a few stick out - this one in particular.

The DD A was a two week stand overseas (there were many more before - I just pretended there weren't).

On his last day in London he took OWUglyIndian out to buy gifts for my girls. He had been getting away with it for so long he was AOK with this scenario.

That morning he was late for his goodnight Skype call to the girls. He jumped out of his whores bed and straight to talking to his wife and children. He denies she was in the room during the calls. I do not believe him.

The cruelty is astonishing. Absolutely zero integrity - I am convinced he is soulless.

The one that hurts me the most, was about 2-3 mo post Dday, Wh was out of town on a job that was m-f but 6 hrs away. One weekend I drove up there to see him. The following weekend he was supposed to drive home to spend with me and DD. He called to say he was too tired to drive that distance and was gonna hang out at the hotel. So Saturday he's texting me all day, says he going to check out some local attraction, keeps texting how he can't find it, he's driving around all day, gives up and goes back to hotel. Fast forward another month, it's Easter, and he's in the hospital, had an abscess in a skull bone, needed surgery to drain it. While in hospital, I find receipts for the weekend he spent out of town, from a local fast food place near home, in the town where OW lives! I was furious. Called him and told him I hoped he got better, but i wasn't coming to get him from the hospital. If he needed a ride, call her. Easter morning I took my DD to hospital to see her dad, but I didn't see him. I let her stay about 5 min then we left. He texts me "5 min, wtf?" I said "you chose to spend a weekend with OW and HER child, instead of me and OUR CHILD. You made your choice." Anyway, that was 2 years ago, lots has happened since.... And I did pick him up from hospital, separated for a few weeks, he was remorseful, falsely, because it didnt end there either....

He's also done other things I find cruel, before the A. About 6 years ago I had gallbladder surgery, went home same day. My MOM took me and brought me home, he worked that day. I came home and still cooked dinner, he didnt offer to help with anything. Also, 4 years ago I had a hysterectomy, was in hospital 4 days, he visited me TWICE. He was busy with work, poor him. I'm only recently remembering these things, realizing his inconsiderate behavior started way before the A. And yet I still picked him up from the hospital, shows how broken I was....

However, I think remembering these things is healthy for me. I don't know if I'm compartmentalizing, or just starting to see things more clearly. But it's making this 180 much easier. I had my own fog to come out of. And I've cried less these past few days, that in of itself feels like progress (for me, not my M. But me comes first from now on...)

The worst was how he would tell me he didn't have time to call/text me while at work, but when I looked at the phone records it became clear that he didn't have time to call or text me because he was texting her so much.

Also, hearing him say that there were times that he wished he was holding her or having sex with her instead of me.

The worst thing he did was lie to me about his flight itinerary to visit his mom by adding an extra day to his trip so he could have a night in a hotel with OW. Called me from local hotel claiming to be at his mom's house in another state.

The douche nozzle would be out until the wee hours of the morning and claim he'd been out at the casino all night with his dad who didn't want to leave.

After I left his sorry ass, he contacted me all the time, wanting to get back together.

One morning I decided to email his whore and tell her she should really keep a better eye on her 'boyfriend' because he'd shown up at my place the night before, huffing and puffing that we needed to be back together.

I KNOW she must contacted him and gave him hell only seconds after getting that message from me, because he contacted ME a few minutes later, whining that I shouldn't have done it.

Too bad. So sad.

Yeah, I'm a bitch like that.

[This message edited by NeverAgain2013 at 8:37 AM, May 26th (Sunday)]

Him spending $20,000 (all of our savings plus a loan) on the prostitutes while telling me we had no money for grocery's and I was trying to save 5 cents on a can of beans.

Him taking them on vacations when we haven't been in 16 years due to money.

Him keeping a suit that he had bought especially for an orgy house party and keeping it in his office for a year hanging up.

Calling him when he was "out of town" on business to see how he was, "oh how was your day, hope you didn't work too hard" and he was with the sluts.

The usual thinking he was getting up early for work and/or working late having his dinner ready and him being with them.

Knowing one of them he was with for a year was close to my daughters age and a gymnast and my daughter is a gymnast. Very creepy, sick.

He was texting me and telling me that he loved me at the same time that he was texting and emailing these other women. Literally he was having a conversation with me at the same time.

Asking for a threesome and describing what he would love to watch happen with me and a friend of mine IN THE MIDDLE OF US HAVING SEX still burns. So triggering.

When I went trough his phone history and found out that on the same night he told me he wasn't in the mood and was too tired for sex, he waited til I fell asleep and watched porn instead. He did that while I was right next to him, in bed.

When I went trough his phone history and found out that on the same night he told me he wasn't in the mood and was too tired for sex, he waited til I fell asleep and watched porn instead. He did that while I was right next to him, in bed.

Oh, mine did that too, also would masterbate beside me in the bed watching porn, would watch porn before and after sex with me and he claims after the whores also. He is a SA, but damn.

I caught him jerking off several times and he denied it lol, um, why else was the bed shaking and you are busting your ass to change the channel, they think we are idiots.;

He had sex with AP#1 a week after his vasectomy before having sex with me, unprotected of course. After I cared for him that whole week too.

He wore the watch from AP#2 that she had given him as a gift their entire 27 months together. Right in my face.

He hung the necklace from AP#3 around his car mirror and it reeked of perfume and insisted I was dreaming.

He fell in love with another woman...

My XH had me make cupcakes for OW's birthday. He told me they were for his students.

2 months after I left him, needed emergency surgery. Send him text @ 6 a. m. telling him where I am. 14 hours later, he responds w/hope all is well. Did manage to text OW 40 x & 2 hours on the phone, tho.

5 days later, threatens to beat my ass & accuses me of making up surgery.

10 days later, cancels my health insurance.

He's a real fucking prize.

SamanthaBaker - yep, I had one of those too During false R, he had a vasectomy which was quite complicated for some reason and he had to have a general anaesthetic etc. I sat with him all day, drove him home, organised his paperwork, took care of him etc etc. Found out that he was texting his OW that morning and again that night, telling her all about his procedure and then how he missed her and how sexy she was

When I found emails between him and OW, he screamed at me that I was a 'conniving bitch' and to 'fuck off out of his sight'.

Also I found yet another phone message on Christmas Eve from another OW, professing her devotion to 'the love of her life'. He called me a 'criminal' for accessing his phone and how he's 'not protecting me' if legal steps were taken

He then had the gall to sit at my parents' dinner table the next day (Christmas day), accept their gifts and eat their lovely meal, make a toast and then disappear to the end of their property to text his OW.

Oh there's so much more. He makes me sick.

During the A my WH encouraged me to take DD out for dinner and a movie. Get some good mommy/daughter time. She was thrilled to go. WH was glad to have the house to himself so he could have some quality texting time with skanky ho.

After our dinner I went to WH's favourite candy shop to get something for him. Ha! Anyway the girl working the shop starts yelling for us to hurry and come in we had to take cover.

A tornado was on the ground and headed toward the shops.

In the shelter phones did not work but texting was going through. I kept texting him. Asking him to check the reports and see if it was going to hit.

Silence. I got nothing from him. I texted him several times. Called him when we got the all clear.

Tornado lifted 2 miles away from the shops. That isn't far.

When we got home I asked him why he never responded. He said he didn't have his phone on.

Phone records tell a different story. Plenty of texts to OW. Pics even. But his wife and young DD didn't rate a response.

Man, this thread makes me all ker-stabbitty.

I've seen it myself - first hand. Yet I STILL find it un-fucking-believable.

(((Hugs to everyone)))

I have never seen such selfish and cruel behavior, what the hell is wrong with these people? I wouldn't treat someone I hated like this..