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Newest Member: mkei

Divorce/Separation :
Dear Wasband, (vent)

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soveryweary ( member #32265) posted at 10:42 PM on Sunday, October 27th, 2013

(( NIK))

Divorced 1/3/14 after 31 years of marriage.

posts: 646   ·   registered: May. 25th, 2011
id 6539336
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realitybites ( member #6908) posted at 11:19 PM on Sunday, October 27th, 2013

My take? He's been thinking about this....how it is soooooooooo unfair to him. He really had no way of approaching you with this but if it he did it right at the time where you are the weakest? He might just get away with it.

Selfish people can't help it. Its been rolling around in his head and GD it he wanted it changed and he had to blurt it out. Couldn't keep that self entitlement inside for one more minute.

How dare you screw that up by being mad about it?

Stop expecting loyalty from people who cannot even give you honesty.

He stopped being my husband the first time he cheated. It took me awhile to understand that I was no longer his wife.

posts: 6939   ·   registered: Apr. 16th, 2005   ·   location: florida
id 6539361
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cmego ( member #30346) posted at 1:32 PM on Monday, October 28th, 2013

((((NIK)))))

me...BS, 46 years old.
Divorced

posts: 4745   ·   registered: Dec. 9th, 2010   ·   location: South
id 6539898
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forlornheart ( member #40726) posted at 1:34 PM on Monday, October 28th, 2013

First - I'm so sorry about your mom. I'm very close to my mom so I understand.

He's a shit heel mother fuc@er!! With lousy timing. Callus hearted, stupid asshole.

(((((Nik)))))

Me: 48- BW
Him: 45-WH-chronic cheater, PA and EA
Current Her: Mid to late 30's fatassed, no necked, troglodyte
D Day: August 23, 2013
Separated: August 23, 2013

posts: 52   ·   registered: Sep. 20th, 2013   ·   location: Michigan
id 6539900
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 nowiknow23 (original poster member #33226) posted at 5:53 PM on Wednesday, October 30th, 2013

Thank you all so much. I don't know why I was taken by surprise on Saturday. My defenses were obviously down. I'm frayed to the breaking point with everything that's going on.

I have had to talk to wasband twice since that blow up - when DD ended up in the hospital the next day with a panic attack, and when DS ended up in the ER yesterday after getting hurt at work. For the record, both kids are ok.

Both times, I was able to maintain control and keep the conversations brief. Not sure I would have been able to pull that off if I were face to face with him, however.

I'm doubling down on my self-care, since the stress is showing no sign of letting up. And the one thing I can count on with wasband is that he will only add to that stress level. Shields firmly in place.

You can call me NIK

And never grow a wishbone, daughter, where your backbone ought to be.
― Sarah McMane

posts: 40250   ·   registered: Aug. 29th, 2011
id 6543175
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Jrazz ( member #31349) posted at 7:01 PM on Wednesday, October 30th, 2013

(((NIK)))

"Don't give up, the beginning is always the hardest." - Deeply Scared's mom

posts: 29076   ·   registered: Feb. 28th, 2011   ·   location: California
id 6543282
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ajsmom ( member #17460) posted at 7:03 PM on Wednesday, October 30th, 2013

Just saw this.

((((nik))))

Take care of yourself, hon.

AJ's MOM

Fidelity isn't a feeling...it's a choice.

"Truth has no special time of its own. Its hour is now - always." - Albert Schweitzer
____________________________________________
Me: BW - Him: 200+ # tumor removed 7/09
One AMAZING DS - 34

posts: 21424   ·   registered: Dec. 21st, 2007   ·   location: Been Through Hell...On My Way Back
id 6543287
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