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If it's a different doctor, I think you need to tread more lightly. Showing up in an office without an appointment and asking to be seen (then insisting on paying) might be perceived as ... indicative not of concern for the children, but entitlement, or control issues, or myriad other things that you do NOT want to convey to him. Perhaps things that reinforce whatever myths your stbx has told him. It may have sent a message opposite the one intended.

This is my son's psychologist. I have met with him before, both alone and with the STBXWW. She has been taking my son alone for the past few months, though, and so has spent more time with him alone. I call him for a report following each session with my son. But my STBXWW told me flat-out that this psych "does not approve of some of the things I have done," so clearly she has been speaking against me. Stupid, as usual to have given me the heads-up on this. In any case, thank you. Yes, I will tread carefully.

I survived. STBXWW was FURIOUS that I was there. And when she found out I had arrived early and paid for the kids' session? I thought she would stab me.

She was speechless with anger, and finally wrote me a check for half, tore it out violently, and gave it to me. "This is not the way it is done," she snarled. I remained calm. "Just deduct it from my bill I owe you from previous appointments."

We were able to sit down with the psych for a few minutes. He wanted to know if we were I the same page and I think was able to see some of the Crazy. "We are NOT" she said. "I did not know he was going to be here."

"I texted her yesterday informing her I would be" I said calmly. She was visibly livid.

She calmed down enough to discuss with me some kid stuff, and at the end started crying. Then she left.

I am proud of myself. But her manner was truly frightening to witness--like a teenager who just had her rock concert tickets taken away by daddy and was ready to kill.

Oh, and I am SURE she is pregnant. I just know it.

[This message edited by Abbondad at 12:17 PM, November 11th (Monday)]

I wonder what book she is using for guidance through this process. I don't know of any legitimate advice that advocates only one parent paying for everything and making every decision regarding their children.

k9

I don't know of any legitimate advice that advocates only one parent paying for everything and making every decision regarding their children

Oh, i think we can all agree that she is reading from the book of "I am so Cray Cray" and she probably authored it.

I would be willing to bet the lot that she thinks the more she pays and you dont repay that the judge will see this as you not pitching in to help - so of course she doesn't want you to stand up and actually be a good man and dad.

I just pray that everyone outside of you can see what is going on.

Any idea what snag her being pregnant would play in all of this legal stuff.

Well done, well played!!!

She might have the "I don't need you, I can do all by myself" thought going thru her head and she is going to prove it to the world she doesn't need you or your money.

You had a witness around for all of this I hope.