Just over 2 years out from D-Day I think I have finally reached a point of acceptance and even though obviously wish this shit show never occurred am at peace and happy in the life I’ve now decided.
My marriage is over (except by law as divorce in Australia can only occur if you seperate), I no longer consider myself to be married. I will never celebrate an anniversary again nor wear a wedding ring. An affair to me broke the whole point of marriage. However I am still with my partner. We can still build a life together albeit different now to what we thought when we married.
It took me a while but I finally figured out what could set me free (so to speak). I was trying to save a marriage I had no desire to be. I was deeply unhappy in my marriage and then my husband had his affair and blew it up well and truly.
Once I let got of trying to do that I feel no pressure, I can relax. This new relationship we are building is for our children, it’s transactional in that we both want better financial stability which together we can help each other. But the truth is while we may not be a perfect couple we do love each other even though the way we love is very different and I know that is where we will never be compatible unfortunately.
I am happy to share a life with this man as he has done work on himself and now we have fun, we laugh, we cry and finally communicate on a deeper level than we ever have. But I know my personality and I will never ever forgive nor forget what he did to me.
Not sure if this is true reconciliation but it’s the closest I will come to it and I’m good with that 😊
