I fell for W2b in the middle of a session of the class we were in; that was late September or early October of 1965. We started meeting for coffee after that class 4 or 5 days a week, but I was afraid to ask her out, for 2 reasons. First, I was afraid she'd refuse me. Second, I was afraid she'd be bored, and I didn't want to have to see her in class every day after failing to win her heart. (Well, and other parts 
.)
In the Spring of 1966, I decided I was not going to pine for someone who 'got away.' I had to know if she'd say 'yes' or 'no.' In fact, we both had very low self-esteem; she thought no one would ever pick her. If ours had bee a little bit higher, we both would have realized that talking for an hour or two 4 or 5 times a week was pretty much indisputably an indication of strong mutual interest.
Our first date was 60 years ago today - June 3, 1966. It was a dance on the college green 3 days before commencement for alums, students, faculty, administrators, parents of students (especially parents of graduating students), friends of the college, etc.
We started with a cocktail party at my parents' house for me, a few of my friends and our dates. Then dinner - plainsong had her first and only lobster in her life (though she has eaten 'dragon shrimp', which are often called 'lobsters', many times). Then the dance. At midnight, my parents left. My mom said to plainsong, 'I do hope to see you again.' That made me wonder if I my mother and plainsong got along too well together.
It didn't take long for limerence to reassert itself. We left the dance about 1:00 and walked over to a park that overlooks the city and talked for a couple of hours. We kissed - frowned upon at the time on the 1st date. I asked her to visit during the summer so we could go to one of George Wein's music festivals (jazz, opera, folk that year).
The dance was magical to both of us. It was the first of a number of very special times beginning that Summer. (They're still happening - I just received photos of our GS dressed for a prom tonight. Maybe his 1st date is on the same day as his grandparents'. 
)
After d-day, memories of those special times together intruded into my consciousness and hers again and again. We both thought and hoped that we could experience new good times and build new good memories, and those thoughts dueled R for us.
Several years after d-day, I read that Gottman noted that couples under stress who remembered good times tended to stay together. Worked for us, but I wished I had read the book much earlier - I would have been less nervous about the success of R.
*****
Sixty years is a complete Chinese astrological cycle. Neither of us have any known Chinese ancestry, but we both have an affinity for things Chinese, and the 60 year cycle carries weight. Besides, 60 years is both a short and a long and, perhaps, a very long time.
Living 60 years didn't surprise me. Being in love for a whole astrological cycle - I never expected that.
It's a gift, not an accomplishment. I'm very, very grateful to the Universe. SI played a part, so Thanks, SI.
