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Newest Member: Talullah

Reconciliation :
I find myself trying to surveillance

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 Sophielou (original poster new member #86356) posted at 11:48 PM on Tuesday, July 28th, 2026

Hello,

So I've got myself into a very bad habit. I know the woman my partner cheated on me with and I know where she lives. Myself and my partner have been honest and said we would start a fresh, however I find myself driving past her street to see if his car is there, or I drive past her street to see if he will come out (it's a dead end and has a bend).

I am honestly not a stalker but it's something my mind is trying to do to keep me safe and trying to find something as a 'I told you so', almost a protection strategy.

I never go near the house or knock on the door. I'm aware how unhealthy it is but it's starting to become a real habit. I don't not trust him but I don't trust him, I'm just scared of being hurt again, you know?

DDay:25th June 2025

posts: 19   ·   registered: Jul. 15th, 2025   ·   location: UK
id 8901625
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GotTheMorbs ( member #86894) posted at 12:19 AM on Wednesday, July 29th, 2026

That sounds normal.

Does he share his location with you on his cell phone? Maybe you could put one of those magnetic tracking devices on his car, too. That way if you want to check on his whereabouts, you don't physically have to be there to see... Only, if you catch yourself staring at your phone or checking constantly, I'd say work with your IC to reduce the need.

I'm not arguing... I'm calibrating

posts: 332   ·   registered: Jan. 5th, 2026   ·   location: USA
id 8901627
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 Sophielou (original poster new member #86356) posted at 12:42 AM on Wednesday, July 29th, 2026

No, at the moment he's got a second job doing deliveries to earn some extra money so it's really hard to wonder if he would be there for her or for his deliveries.

I'm just worried it's becoming unhealthy, like I'm driving past this street multiple times and it's impacting my life, but I wasn't sure if it was normal. I'd also question that the surveillance only gives me temporary relief, then it adds did I miss him? Maybe he's going later? Maybe he's parked somewhere else etc? When would it ever be enough? You know.

DDay:25th June 2025

posts: 19   ·   registered: Jul. 15th, 2025   ·   location: UK
id 8901630
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