Newest Member: SoBeyondLost17


ME: BW(30), WH(30) NO KIDS Together for 12yrs, married for 5yrs DDay#1 01.19.20 PA OW1 (A start 05.19) DDay#2 TT 02.18.20 EA OW2 (A start 03/18 lasted a year) DDay #3 03.13.20 (broke NC w/ OW1 6 days after DDay#1, 1x PA) Status: Separated

Can't Catch a Break

My dad had another stroke on my birthday last Thursday, 3 weeks after I told my parents about WH's affairs and told them I will divorce him. WH came to my dad about 2 weeks ago to apologize, he cried and my dad cried while patting his head and back. My dad loves WH, always treats him like he's his own son and it killed me to watch that.

I feel like the worst thing will happen (and they always do happen in my life so far) that my dad will die soon after my divorce. I just can't live with the guilt but I also know if I choose not to divorce I'd sacrifice my own happiness.

This whole thing is so fucked up.

9 comments posted: Wednesday, August 19th, 2020

WH has moved out and I'm moving here

Hi, All. It's been a while and now the time has come that I move to this forum.

I want to share with you what's been going on with my life:

- WH has moved out 10 days ago. Watching him in a state of shock, begged for my forgiveness, for us to stay together and him collapsing on the floor crying like someone has died really broke my heart. I cried for 2 days straight but since day 3 until now I can honestly say I'm in a good place.

- IC is a game changer for me. It helps me to really shift the focus on my own healing, my own needs, things that I've overlooked and figuring out what I want for myself, what I deserve.

Those painful triggers are almost gone completely, I no longer have the urges for revenge, I'm at peace.

I completely understand why people here in SI highly suggest BS to go to IC immediately. I wish I can say thank you to all of you in person.

- I've been figuring out ways to forgive, move past the infidelity, reconcile with WH but in the end I've come to realized that cheating is a deal breaker for me. I would never trust him to be the father of my child and that alone is reason enough to divorce.

I don't know what I would actually feel when I'm officially divorced but I still have some time to prepare myself. Any suggestions or inputs would be highly appreciated

9 comments posted: Tuesday, August 4th, 2020

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