Newest Member: KMS60087

Timeforhelp

Remorse

How long did it take your WS to show you genuine remorse for their actions and the damage it caused?

My WS is a serial cheater who still doesn’t get it, but likes to make a big show of fake apologies until it’s obvious I don’t buy it then he either gets mad or sulks.

Will this ever change?

18 comments posted: Monday, December 20th, 2021

How do you accept what has happened?

This is the first post I have made for quiet sometime as I found the previous messages about leaving my husband hard to take, so please be measured and gentle with any responses.

I have been having trouble believing my husbands version of the truth with regards to a couple (I know rolleyes rolleyes ) of his affairs. They just never seemed to add up to me.

Following another terrible discussion about this fact where he once again swore that he was telling the truth, I realised that the reason I couldn’t accept what he said was because of how painful it was to believe that a) for one of the affairs he apparently only kissed the OW twice and she gave him oral sex but not to completion before, after I confronted him about the relationship, he left me for her. Only to return a couple of days later after ‘sealing the deal’.

b)That he had an 18 month emotional affair with a work colleague whilst we had a dead bedroom. He claims he didn’t touch her in anyway and they didn’t discuss leaving respective partners, it was just flirting. He says our dead bedroom was because he would masturbate to thoughts of her.

My head tells me that it can’t be true that someone who supposedly loved me for 7 years prior to the affair (a) and then for another 10 years before affair (b) would drop me like a piece of shit (sorry) for two kisses and an imaginary girlfriend.

Any help in how to reconcile this would be appreciated.

31 comments posted: Monday, November 29th, 2021

Is reconciliation possible?

WS and I are currently approximately 6 weeks out from dday 3 which consisted of new information about his PA.

Following the disclosure of new information we have been trying to get back on track with WS writing a new time line and answering my questions. However, I have been struggling with the fact that even with this new time line and new information there are gaping holes in his story which my mind is fixated on.

It is only because of the ‘gut feelings’ I have had that I know as much as I do about WS affairs so don’t want to dismiss the intuition. Husband assured me there is nothing more, but I just can’t believe him.

My question is therefore Can you reconcile with a WS if you have no trust in them? Or is this the nail in the coffin of my marriage?

8 comments posted: Friday, January 1st, 2021

Rewriting the marriage history

WS Only

[This message edited by SI Staff at 1:34 PM, July 24th (Friday)]

0 comment posted: Friday, July 24th, 2020

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