One year after I was doing everything to save my marriage I found out why it wasn’t working
This is my story.
In April 2025, after a couple of rocky months, my wife came back from a short trip to her hometown and, out of the blue, told me we were over. It hit me like a bolt of lightning. I asked questions. She said we had grown apart, that she didn’t feel seen by me anymore, and that the attraction was gone.
From that point on, I started working on myself. I meditated, helped more at home, joined a support group for husbands—nothing worked. In June, two weeks before we were supposed to go on vacation, she told me she needed more space and decided to go on vacation with a girlfriend instead, leaving me alone with our child and no backup plan.
She came back and said she wanted to try again. I continued my path, kept working on myself, and tried to be the best version of me. Still, she seemed disgusted by me. She sent me to live in the basement because she "needed more space," then moved out in November for the same reason—yet still wanted to spend Christmas together.
The days we spent together were great, to the point that everyone around us was saying, "What’s going on here?" Then, on December 31st, she told me again that she needed more space and couldn’t be with me anymore. I told her I respected her choice. She said she wanted to end things amicably, for the sake of our child, before things became nasty.
Well.
Just two days later, I found her journal. It contained graphic details of her relationship with another man that had been going on since September 2023—one and a half years before she ever said things were bad between us. There was also a clear plan to make me quit my job and relocate to another country where this guy lives, so she could take our child with her and be with him.
I am shattered. One thing was the divorce, but discovering I had lived in a lie for so long is a whole different level of betrayal. Letting her go is easy now; healing is not. I don’t know where to start. I’m torn between telling her to fuck off and staying amicable for the sake of my child.
The crazy part is that everything was planned from the beginning. In her journal there was a mkt about the different options and she stroke out the confession one because she was afraid of public shaming
5 comments posted: Friday, January 9th, 2026
