2 months in…. second thoughts

Hi all. So I’m approximately 10 weeks since DD. My husband has been the perfect man since all this came out. His been open and honest answered all questions. He is receiving IC. We are also in CC every week.

My husband has taken accountability for his actions and poor decision making and appears to be regretful.

He has given me passwords for his phone his location and communicates what his doing ect.

At first this all felt good. However I’m now having second thoughts. I don’t know what I want, some days I just want to walk away as I feel he took the Pi** and lied so hard, almost sent me crazy but I was right about everything all along.

My husband despite him cheating for a year- was always present and done what he needed to do , he didn’t treat me bad while he was having his affair. (Except Lie) when I got a hunch about something.

I’ve also got a small baby (8months) and have been suffering with post partum depression since she has been born. I’m wondering if this is clouding my decision making.

I love my husband but am disappointed and just feel our relationship will never be the same again. Some days I want it will to work and other I’m like my husband is having his cake and eat it- his cheated for a year got her pregnant and I’ve taken him back. I feel like a fool.

I need support and advice please. Xx

2 comments posted: Monday, August 17th, 2026

I’m so torn please any advise welcome

Hi all. I’ve been married 3 years with my husband for coming up 9 years.
I had a feeling he was being unfaithful as was receiving messages on social media giving me hints. I then recorded him and tracked his movements and found out everything. It had been going on a year- work colleague. Initially they were friends and he could lean on her emotionally, then began sleeping with her on occasions. She fell pregnant and had a termination.

If I never received the messages to my social media I wouldn’t have had a clue- my husband has been good to me and his behaviour never changed he remained consistent with me and in the home. And I know he loves me.

I’m angry as I approached him many times asking him if he is seeing someone and he gaslighted me and made me think it was someone being spiteful. He claimed all was untrue.

Since he has admitted things and I’ve also spoken to the other woman. He has taken full accountability and will seek therapy for him to help him understand why he made these choices. I do admit I was not there emotionally for my husband and I didn’t care or nurture him for some time, but this was because I had a gut instinct that he was doing something I just couldn’t prove it. I can’t be fake and although we slept together I didn’t pay him much mind at all. However this is no excuse for his behaviour.

He wants his family back and says he has blocked the other woman and will have no further contact, he says he will do whatever it takes for me to trust him again and he will not quit trying. We have also started couples therapy.

I’m conflicted- I love my husband dearly but I feel he has told so many lies , I’m unsure I’ll ever trust him again. He has always been good to me but this hurts more that he was able to live 2 different lives.

I need advice support from others who got through this. I don’t know what to do.

8 comments posted: Sunday, June 28th, 2026