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SomewhereElse ( new member #30031) posted at 6:59 AM on Wednesday, April 13th, 2011
XOW here, several months out and doing really well.
MM have to justify the affair so they take a fault and magnify it or they lie to the OW in order to justify the affair. It's all about justification!
As for being throw under the bus, they sometimes see the error of their ways and decide they do want their marriage or sometimes they want to keep the affair going so they will say whatever to try to get things back on a even keel at home and then continue the affair if the OW allows it.
You have to find your own closure and I know it hurts to be lied to and to feel used but you also have to figure out why and how you let yourself get into a messy high risk situation such as this. You can heal........it's not easy but you can, but you have to start looking at yourself and take the focus off of him.
Hugs.....
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