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My BH is playing at a local golf tournament this morning. He's been looking forward to it for months. I was planning on coming with the kids a little bit later to support him. He just called me and says OM and his BW and baby are there (I cant believe I forgot OM plays also). My BH says he's trembling inside but he wants to stay because he has no reason to run. He just wanted to let me know in case that changed my mind about coming. I asked him straight out, would it mean more to him if I came to support him or if I didn't come. He says he doesn't know, he's just not thinking straight right now. Of course, I'd rather not see OM at all and I have no intention of ANY form of interaction much less looking at them, but I don't want BH to think I don't support him. Maybe we should appear together as a united force? Right now I'm leaning toward not going but I don't want BH to feel abandoned or unsupported. Any opinions?

BTW, we're 8 months from DD and our marriage is doing great. We have more good days than bad and communicating more than ever. I don't want to make the wrong move here.

Tough one. What time were you planning on going?

It starts now and goe for 3 hours. I was originally just going to show up for 30min-1 hour or as long as two small kids would allow me.

More often than not, in confusing situations like this one, it seems like the BS wishes their WS would show support for the BS. I think I would go.

Golf courses are large enough as it is. You may see OM, but you will be tailing your BH as closely as possible, right? Is it time to get your walking shoes on?

ETA: might be tough to do with the kiddos.

[This message edited by BaxtersBFF at 9:35 AM, May 5th (Saturday)]

Well, since you have some time then I would give your H a little time to come to terms with what is going on and then call him again and ask him how to handle the sitch.

Let him know that you want to support him in any way you can. If that means to stay home so he doesnt have to worry about OM trying to talk to you so be it. If it means going there and being his cheerleader then do that. Let him know what is troubling you and that you want to handle the sitch in whatever way he is comfortable.

Good Luck

Jewel

Thank you for the advice. My BH just texted me and said OM saw him and left. So I'm going to go support him and love him!

Yay! Prob solved Have fun!

YEA! What a good solution to the problem. I'll bet a great big hug when you see him would do him a lot of good.

Thank goodness.

Hope your BH does well today.

Good that he left. When you do get there, if you are able, I would go give your BH a big hug and kiss and whisper in his ear that you love HIM, that you are there for HIM, and are very glad that you are!!

Enjoy your day!