SurvivingInfidelity.com^®

1000? Thats nothing.

WW sent/received 10,241 texts 3/2012. A huge portion of those with MOM. Most other months, 8-9000.

sighhh

Oy. I'm right there with ya. In my case it's tweets and IM's, but he can tweet all day and not manage to say "boo" to me until we're face to face.

In my case, I feel like there are two things perpetuating this problem:

1. Avoidance! As much as we want to fix the marriage, it's hard and sometimes I'm no fun (overwhelming sadness). Texting other people who aren't in any sort of drama with him or are in the happy/easy end of a drama is a total escape from reality!

2. Something is still missing in my WS's life. Some emotional need is not being met. He has yet to figure out what it is and communicate with me. I have a feeling it is some need I may not be able to fill. I hope sometime soon he'll figure it out (He's in IC)

It's so frustrating and hard to accept. I wish you the best!

I am totally with you on this. I went back and got all of the records. On average, my husband was texting both OW 3500+ times a month (yes, over 7000 times a month) and in same period, he would only send me about 400. It makes me sick when I look at that. Seriously, why am I still here?

I asked for her opinion on this.

her answer-

I understand how the hurt party in the relationship feels. I wish I can explain it, but I don't know how. I'm the wife who cheated on husband by having an emotional affair. I too txt and called the other man much more then I ever txt or called my husband. Like I said before I have no way to explain it, I don't know why we txt and talked on the phone so much. Really looking back it was stupid we mostly would talk about work or our children, we would talk about Facebook  such as games on Facebook. I would have to say that today I feel bad when I txt, it feels like I'm doing something wrong even if its texting my husband. I know it shouldn't make me feel bad, I suppose it's just how my mind works. Just in reading what you all posted has made me feel very low today like this is how my husband must feel. I feel so sad for my husband and all of you, that people like myself find it so easy to hurt the ones we love, yet can't find the time to fix what they have broken in your hearts.

After reading it a couple of times I think that she minimized it.

She failed to mention the pics sent back and forth that of what I might never know.

She didn't mention the sexting or phone sex which she says he sarted.

She didn't mention how after DDay I blocked his number and she continued to call him every day.

How he was "helping our marriage".

Or his words of undying love for the past 18 years, and continued request for her to leave me. For what I'm not sure he is still married.

So, I guess my problem is why did he put so much effort towards her but doesn't towards me? It's not that I NEED the texts, but I just constantly wonder why he texts her so much more.

I'm confused, you use present tense not past. Is he still texting her? If so you're not in reconciliation. Your WH needs to be a Fwh if you're here.

Are you in IC, the two of you in MC?

Purely a typographical error. Should have been in the past tense.

Mamak....I just posted pretty much the same thing as you. Sorry I didnt read yours first. I just needed to get out about how bad I was feeling about all the texting my H did when he was in a EA! Like i said he was doing alot of texting to his buddies last night over the ballgame. I started thinking about all the times he was texting her while I was sitting next to him. I guess my question would be the same as yours....WHY?? What were they texting? I just have one thing for ya..(((HUGS)))

Forever Faithful - I was just about to respond to your post as well! Sending (( hugs )) right back to you!