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Divorce/Separation :
So many decisions

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 confused52204 (original poster member #16913) posted at 4:57 PM on Wednesday, May 29th, 2013

So I have decided I just can't do it. It's been since oct I started to find out pieces of the story then found out full story in march. It is crazy....Craigslist shit for 2 years. Naked pics. Also main search was men. I have a 5 yo daughter. Been down crazy road b4 w my ex h. Don't really want to continue to b unhappy w my current fiancé. It's a lose lose situation. If I stay I run risk of not getting over it and finding it more difficult to R or stay. If I go then I will b lonely but at least no more constant analyzing of the situation. How did u know u were making right decision by leaving? Right now my brain is saying go but my heart says stay! He of course wants me to stay. I'm so overwhelmed...

posts: 745   ·   registered: Nov. 6th, 2007
id 6353396
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 confused52204 (original poster member #16913) posted at 4:59 PM on Wednesday, May 29th, 2013

Oh and we baught a house together in September so I need to refi ASAP if I want him out! Otherwise hd would just stay....

So many decisions I can't make up my mind!! Wtf is wrong w me!

posts: 745   ·   registered: Nov. 6th, 2007
id 6353399
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tesla ( member #34697) posted at 11:29 PM on Wednesday, May 29th, 2013

If you've been down this road, then you know what it is like. Why do it again? Decide what you want...a ticket for the crazy train or lonely for a little while?

Give me lonely any day of the week.

I found that IC helped me sort out my options and do what was best for *me*.

"Thou art the son and heir of a mongrel bitch." --King Lear

posts: 5066   ·   registered: Jan. 31st, 2012
id 6353951
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ButterflyGirl ( member #38377) posted at 12:21 AM on Thursday, May 30th, 2013

I knew to leave when that sounded so much better and healthier and easier than sticking around and trying to fix the broken disgusting pile of crap that was my marriage (that and a million other reasons, but who's counting..). Only you can decide when it's time to pull the plug..

But I wouldn't let your fear of being lonely stop you from leaving. I'd MUCH rather be alone than constantly wondering whether I was being lied to or manipulated..

And you never know what windows will open when you finally shut and lock that door..

You say you're unhappy, so it really isn't a lose/lose. It's a lose if you stay and a possible win if you go..

Honestly, the fact that he was searching for men as well tells me you are never going to be everything he wants and "needs." I don't have a problem with homosexuality or bisexuality, but I do have a big problem with people who are not monogamous after they have promised to be..

Big hugs to you.. ((((confused))))

xBW~ 40
Two DS~ 15 and 11

posts: 3123   ·   registered: Feb. 6th, 2013   ·   location: Flat Earth
id 6354030
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