Cookies are required for login or registration. Please read and agree to our cookie policy to continue.

Newest Member: Starrystarrynight

New Beginnings :
Help! decode, decipher, talk me through

This Topic is Archived
default

cmego ( member #30346) posted at 12:16 PM on Saturday, June 1st, 2013

The whole "what we have now is far superior" comment throws me. What do we have? we are both genuine. We laugh. We get along. We are intelligent and kind. I bet we make a pretty picture together. We have good table manners. What exactly about that is superior?? We are two decent people with no chemistry?

Yeah, I'm with you on this. It is such an odd comment, and clearly he views your relationship FAR differently than you do. In fact, it isn't a relationship, but a very casual friendship with no real intimacy, emotional or physical, right? He has you at arms length and there is nothing you can do about it.

My fSO declared his undying love for me a few months ago. I loved hearing every word, then he poofed again. You know what I did?

...and walked away. I can't wish him into someone else either. Serious intimacy issues and until he figures himself out...I'm not interested. I refuse. REFUSE. to be in another relationship with a man who does not have himself figured out or isn't capable of being in a full relationship.

Some think this is harsh...but...NEXT.

me...BS, 46 years old.
Divorced

posts: 4745   ·   registered: Dec. 9th, 2010   ·   location: South
id 6357561
default

TrustGone ( member #36654) posted at 1:55 PM on Saturday, June 1st, 2013

It sounds like he is just looking for a friend and doesn't want an intimate relationship with you. There are guys out there like that, not many, but a few that have GF's that are not romantic "GF's". It also sounds like he is not ready for a relationship and maybe that's why he took down his site. Maybe he saw that this was leading up to that and it scared him. You say he had a friend that left a year ago for her relationship. It sounds like he was just looking for this friends replacement when he found you. If he doesn't actually initiate any physical contact with you and you are holding his hand then that tells me he doesn't want any physical relationship with you. If you have trouble being around him as just a friend, then tell him that and move on to what you are looking for. It sounds like he has some issues (baggage) that he is carrying around and you don't need anymore of that (RED FLAG WAVING) in another relationship.

XWH#2-No longer my monkey Divorced 8/15, Now married to a wonderful man.
"A person is either an asset or a lesson"
"Changing who you are with does not change who you are"

posts: 10077   ·   registered: Aug. 30th, 2012   ·   location: Texas
id 6357623
default

Hope24 ( member #9344) posted at 2:00 PM on Saturday, June 1st, 2013

For the life of me, I can't figure out why people like this are on dating sites.

Did his profile state that he was looking for friends only?

She packed up her potential and all she had learned and headed out to change a few things.

posts: 7772   ·   registered: Jan. 10th, 2006   ·   location: Poolside
id 6357626
This Topic is Archived
Cookies on SurvivingInfidelity.com®

SurvivingInfidelity.com® uses cookies to enhance your visit to our website. This is a requirement for participants to login, post and use other features. Visitors may opt out, but the website will be less functional for you.

v.1.001.20250404a 2002-2025 SurvivingInfidelity.com® All Rights Reserved. • Privacy Policy