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Off Topic :
Cousin died

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 fallingquickly (original poster member #36599) posted at 8:46 AM on Saturday, June 1st, 2013

I'm not sure where to post this so I figured Off Topic was best.

My cousin found out her husband was cheating on her at about the same time I did. We have been supporting each other. Talking occasionally. She lives in another state. We are the same age and grew up together.

I found out today that her WH came home from the store and found her dead. Her daughter says there are some missing medications. The anniversary of her DD was coming up. I hope it's natural causes but I have my doubts. My heart is breaking for her and her daughter.

This is so sudden and incomprehensible.

Scars remind us where we've been. They don't have to dictate where we're going. (Criminal Minds)

I saw him, I could not unsee him. -StrongButBroken

There came a point when it was too painful to love him, so I stopped.

posts: 468   ·   registered: Aug. 25th, 2012
id 6357511
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woundedby2 ( member #18522) posted at 9:02 AM on Saturday, June 1st, 2013

(((falling)))

I'm so sorry. Saying a prayer for you and your cousin's family.

In 2010 I divorced the NPD assclown who cheated on me with my best friend.

Everybody, soon or late, sits down to a banquet of consequences.
~Robert Louis Stevenson

posts: 8027   ·   registered: Mar. 7th, 2008   ·   location: SoCal
id 6357514
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TrustNoOne ( member #16591) posted at 9:08 AM on Saturday, June 1st, 2013

((((falling)))))

I'm so sorry for your loss.

It's only natural that you might draw parallels between you two. Know that while the pain you shared may be similar - if the missing medications lead to a tragic conclusion, that isn't YOUR outcome. OK?

My heart hurts for you.

posts: 1373   ·   registered: Oct. 12th, 2007   ·   location: San Diego
id 6357516
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 fallingquickly (original poster member #36599) posted at 10:11 AM on Saturday, June 1st, 2013

Don't worry, TrustNoOne. I have no desire to die at all. I have very much to live for.

It breaks my heart that she might not have felt that way, too. She was a lovely, fun, in your face kind of girl. She was my sister's best friend. She has two children and parents she loved with all her heart and who loved her in return. I know she was devastated by her husband's actions but I didn't expect this. I hope it turns out to be natural causes, especially for those she left behind.

Scars remind us where we've been. They don't have to dictate where we're going. (Criminal Minds)

I saw him, I could not unsee him. -StrongButBroken

There came a point when it was too painful to love him, so I stopped.

posts: 468   ·   registered: Aug. 25th, 2012
id 6357522
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simplydevastated ( member #25001) posted at 11:44 AM on Saturday, June 1st, 2013

(((Hugs)))

I'm so sorry to hear this. My heart is breaking for you and your family.

Me - BS, 40 (I'm not old...I'm vintage)
Two Wonderful children - DS11, DD8
Getting my ducks in a row for divorce... finally (4+ D-Days too many - listed in profile.)

posts: 6121   ·   registered: Jul. 31st, 2009   ·   location: In the darkest depths of hell!
id 6357547
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Sad in AZ ( member #24239) posted at 1:39 PM on Saturday, June 1st, 2013

Does everyone know about the infidelity in her life? Was she is a real R situation with her WH?

I'm sorry if this is painful, but this sounds like the beginning of a True Crime show to me. If it had been a secret, you might think about anonymously tipping off the police in her area.

You are important and you matter. Your feelings matter. Your voice matters. Your story matters. Your life matters. Always.

Me: FBS (no longer betrayed nor a spouse)-63
D-day: 2007 (two years before finding SI)
S: 6/2010; D: 3/2011

posts: 25351   ·   registered: Jun. 3rd, 2009   ·   location: Arizona
id 6357607
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gonnabe2016 ( member #34823) posted at 4:22 PM on Saturday, June 1st, 2013

I'm so sorry.

{{{hugs}}}

"Oh, what a tangled web we weave when first we practice to deceive." - Sir Walter Scott

In my effort to be *concise*, I often come off as blunt and harsh. Sorry, don't mean to be offensive.

posts: 9241   ·   registered: Feb. 15th, 2012   ·   location: Midwest
id 6357720
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nowiknow23 ( member #33226) posted at 5:09 PM on Saturday, June 1st, 2013

I'm so very sorry, falling. Keeping you and your cousin's family in my thoughts. (((((hugs)))))

You can call me NIK

And never grow a wishbone, daughter, where your backbone ought to be.
― Sarah McMane

posts: 40250   ·   registered: Aug. 29th, 2011
id 6357756
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jo2love ( member #31528) posted at 6:52 PM on Saturday, June 1st, 2013

(((falling)))

posts: 51035   ·   registered: Mar. 16th, 2011
id 6357867
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cass ( member #24261) posted at 7:58 PM on Saturday, June 1st, 2013

((((falling))))

That's awful. Sudden death is doubly difficult because shock and grief together makes it so much harder.

Holding you and her family in my thoughts.

DDay - April 2008
Me - 58 and doing great, alone.

Don't put the key to your happiness in someone else's pocket!

posts: 5188   ·   registered: Jun. 4th, 2009   ·   location: Scotland
id 6357936
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 fallingquickly (original poster member #36599) posted at 8:16 PM on Saturday, June 1st, 2013

Thank you for your hugs. This is so hard to understand. She's so young.

Sad in AZ,

Yes, everyone knows about WH. He was very remorseful as far as anyone knows. She did not forgive him or even care about him much anymore. She was staying with him because she had worked too hard all her life for the life they had. My mother and I both think there might be something more to her death, but have no foundation for that.

The year mark was very hard for me. It's when I began to think there had to be more based on my WH's behaviors. A few months later I found out there was a lot more. I spoke to my cousin last week. She was really sad as was I. I'm sure they will do an autopsy to find cause of death.

Scars remind us where we've been. They don't have to dictate where we're going. (Criminal Minds)

I saw him, I could not unsee him. -StrongButBroken

There came a point when it was too painful to love him, so I stopped.

posts: 468   ·   registered: Aug. 25th, 2012
id 6357945
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