SurvivingInfidelity.com^®

I have made the decision to meet with a lawyer. Would appreciate suggestions regarding questions to ask.

Debt responsibilities, support for your and/or kids. How to effectively dissolve marriage in shortest amount of time.

Hello,

I am a few months into lawyer meetings and it's not easy. I wish you luck.

Things being worked on here are my rights for being a parent (custody and visitation issues) and my rights in regard to the property we own.

My lawyer (L) was interested also in things like any money given to us in lieu of child support by ExH, like bank statements, to show proof of it. In further regard to finances, he is also interested in any financial assets-stock, pension, savings...as you may have rights to it.

He asked for my tax forms from the last year, too. I worked hard and had many of these at hand prior to my initial meeting and it helped to speed up starting the process.

FWIW, I ask questions when there are problems with the visits with ExH and our daughter and I save them up because if it gets too long or detailed, he will charge for it more.

Again I wish you luck and am sorry for your difficult time. Hope this helped at all.

Bring financial info, like your most recent tax forms, a list of real property owned, with purchase dates and mortgage balances, retirement accounts/pensions with balances and date opened, any car loans, credit cards with account holder, date opened and balances. Assuming you have nothing fancy going on like companies you own, the L will have a pretty good idea of what your settlement will look like.

If your kids (if any) are on your health insurance, try to find out how much you pay compared to how much for the single plan. That's usually factored into the child support calculations. If they're on hers, and she will be primary residential, tell the L that. If they're on hers and you're primary residential, you'll need the same info for her plan.

Best thing to do is to get a feel for the L's personality, whether his/her style suits you, and the type of stbx you have. Some stbxs want to get out asap and will just agree to everything, and some are NPD jackasses who will fight you over everything. If you have the latter, you'll want a more aggressive attorney.

Good luck!

[This message edited by roughroadahead at 9:20 AM, June 5th (Wednesday)]

Here are a few questions to give you a starting point.

How experienced are you in family law?

What percentage of your practice is devoted to family law?

How long have you been practicing?

What is your overall philosophy or style when handling divorce work?

How would you describe your personality as a lawyer?

What is your attitude regarding negotiations and mediation?

Are you more likely to tell me what to do, or offer options and expect me to make a decision?

Do you represent more men or more women?

Do you handle child custody cases?

How well do you know the judges?

How many divorce cases have you tried?

How do you prefer to communicate with clients?

How responsive are you to communications from clients?

Will there be assistants or staff working on my case?

What kind of resources do you make available to clients to make the divorce process less difficult and painful?

What fees and costs can I expect other than charges for your time?

How would you predict a judge would rule on the issues in my case?

Are there are any questions I’ve neglected to ask, or anything else that you can tell me at this time. Is there anything else you should know before deciding whether to hire you?

Told the lawyer yesterday to start the procedings -