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KBeguile (original poster member #38348) posted at 5:53 AM on Sunday, June 9th, 2013
I'm very pleased to report that I had a heartfelt and very direct discussion with Heart about our situation. I have gained new insights as to her personal feelings and her position, as well as having a better understanding of myself and my growth since D-Day.
The best part, though, is that I didn't take any of it personally, I didn't start withdrawing, I didn't have a pity party, or any of that other "all about me" crap. It was really a great feeling.
Me: WS 34
Her: BS 37 (HeartInADustpan)
DS: 7yo
M: 9 years
DDays: 2012/11/14-2013/02/05, 2013/03/09, 2016/02/19
Jrazz ( member #31349) posted at 6:47 AM on Sunday, June 9th, 2013
That's great to hear, KBeguile. In keeping with the vein of selflessness, how did SHE feel about the talk?
Hopefully a followup with her reveals some kind of relief and comfort.
[This message edited by Jrazz at 2:11 AM, June 9th (Sunday)]
"Don't give up, the beginning is always the hardest." - Deeply Scared's mom
KBeguile (original poster member #38348) posted at 7:54 AM on Sunday, June 9th, 2013
According to her, it was comforting, validating (of my Craniorectal Implantation), and insightful (into how I thought pre-D-Day). I think she's relieved to see that I've made visible progress. Hell, she flat-out told me that "(she) didn't need (me)," and I took it far better than I would have pre-D-Day (which would have been to mope, disagree, whine, and so forth).
Upon further investigation/reflection, we have established that the Fog is now only apparently conditional and contained to certain situations, rather than being wide-spread and interfering in everything I try to do; it's pretty well-contained to my NPD tendencies now. I don't try to do as many "mental gymnastics" with regard to my behavior during my As, nor do I attempt to defend myself or the OPs.
I still need to work on NPD-related issues, but I'm getting there.
Me: WS 34
Her: BS 37 (HeartInADustpan)
DS: 7yo
M: 9 years
DDays: 2012/11/14-2013/02/05, 2013/03/09, 2016/02/19
Jrazz ( member #31349) posted at 8:11 AM on Sunday, June 9th, 2013
That sounds like a LOT of work. Hopefully you are experiencing some relief from your new path as well. 
"Don't give up, the beginning is always the hardest." - Deeply Scared's mom
authenticnow ( member #16024) posted at 12:28 PM on Sunday, June 9th, 2013
Good job, KBeguile! Keep going .
DS, you are forever in my heart. Thank you for sharing your beautiful spirit with me. I will always try to live by the example you have set. I love you and miss you every day and am sorry you had to go so soon, it just doesn't seem fair.
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